Resolving Marital Conflicts Dos and Don’ts

In a nutshell;

DOs

1. Discuss the problem.

2. Listen!

3. Identify the source of the problem

4. Be honest to your own self about your own faults and take responsibility for your own share of the problem.

5. Give your spouse the benefit of the doubt remembering that we are all human with weaknesses and forgive.

6. Brainstorm on ways you can resolve the problem.

7. Daily work towards solving the problem and avoid situations that can trigger the problem.

8. Keep the lines of communication open and be accountable to each other.

9. Be positive and confess the result you want to see.

10. If the problem is beyond what you can both handle, seek for professional help.

 

DON’TS

1. Sweep issues that give you a great cause for concern under the carpet. Ignoring it may just mean postponing the evil day. A stitch in time saves nine.

2. Be on the the defensive, creating a wall around you as this will not solve anything.

3. Assume the other person is thinking or is fully aware of the problem.

4. Try to put the other person down by attacking their personality or running them down,

5. Replace talking about the problem with sex. Sex doesn’t resolve most conflicts.

6. Invite a third party without trying to work out the conflict together.

7. Use the children as human weapons or shields against each other. You may damage them in the process.

8. Nag.

9. Use a piece of information revealed to you in confidence against each other nor refer to mistakes in the past. Focus on the present.

10. Lie to your spouse.