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Dear MIM: I’m pregnant but he still beats me. How can I legally prevent my husband from beating me?

Dear MIM: I’m pregnant but he still beats me. How can I legally prevent my husband from beating me?

Please advice me.

Are there legal ways I can make my husband understand that I can no longer endure the way he treats me. I am 25 and he’s 31. We got married in 2011. We have  2girls, 3 and 1 year-old , and I’m even pregnant again.

Since we got married, he beats me for any slight mistake not to now talk of when we’re having a serious misunderstanding. He gives me hot slaps like craze for any little offense. Within these few years of our marriage, I can’t count the number of times he’s beaten me. He even beats me when I am pregnant. Anytime we have a misunderstanding, he won’t drop money for food. I will be left to suffer for those number of days till we reconcile. I was not working. This time around, during an argument, he pulled off my chain, earnings and wristwatch. He almost killed me as he tried to strangle me and saying that he will kill me. He said he would naked and disgrace me outside. He slapped and hit my head on the wall. When he released his hand from my neck, I called him a bastard. He then called his parents to report and told me to show him his real father. I didn’t mean to call him bastard in that sense.

All I meant was that he is good for nothing man as it has several meaning. All this while, I never told them or my mum how he treats me.

After that incidence, he asked for the key to my shop, but I didn’t give him because I knew he intentionally wanted to punish me as he knows that’s the only source I can get money from to take care of the kids and I. He just opened the supermarket for me after all these years of staying at home cause he insisted he’s not going to allow me work under anyone. I’m an NCE holder, he’s an ND holder but owns a recording studio. This last beating he gave me was even inside the shop he just opened for me. I had a customer who wanted to patronise me on Sunday but he didn’t want me to go. He threatened that I must not return to home if I go. That’s what he does; he tells me to leave the house for every little disagreement. I finally went to sell as the customer kept begging me because she needed the goods for the following week. My husband didn’t want to listen. He’s so arrogant and won’t listen to me. I can’t advise him. He likes doing things his own way. He talks to me as if I’m not human. Even, my 3-year-old can now say, “daddy is wicked.,” because he would shout at her too like she’s a dog. His wickedness is unbearable. The beating aspect is what I’m really tired of . I’ve suffered so much.

How will a man see his wife as someone he can just put his hands on at any slight misunderstanding. If I didn’t have kids and pregnant again, I would have left this man so that he wont kill me for my Mum as I’m fatherless. I’m tired. Since, he’s beaten me a few days ago, he hasn’t come home to sleep. I’ve decided to go and report him to his parent this weekend. Meanwhile, how else can I legally stop him from beating me? He’s turning me into something else.

View Comments (9)
  • My sis, ln my own opinion, you should give yourself a break. Report to his parents then go stay with your mum for some time.
    We hear stories of how husband kill wife. This is how it starts.
    If you are dead, he’ll marry another wife and his parents will still embrace the other woman.
    Think about your life, your children, siblings & your mum. You are too young to face this kind of situation. Above all, pray and ask God to take control of the situation.
    It is well!!!!!!

    • Firstly,how did u meet him?was there any courtship b4 d marriage?Is your husband depressed or frustrated? It’s his business going well? Have you made an effort to have a talk with him or tell your parents or his about this problem? If u have confirmed his mental stability and have talked with both your parentsand there’still no change in his behaviour,my dear just pick up the kids and scram as fast your legs can carry you,unless u want an untimely obituary.

  • Please leave this man………………….run far away. Ensure to get a divorce and move on cos he wont change.Please run for your dear life

  • Why did u want to kill yourself before time, at least you should have PITY for the innocent children. Kindly invite both family and discuss the issue in their presence, then if he did not change is better you run for your life because if anything happen to you he will surely marry another woman. A word is enough for a wise. DON’T KILL YOURSELF

  • If you are in Lagos, you can file for a protection order against domestic violence under the protection from domestic violence law. talk to a lawyer.

  • how manage u were going thru all dis and u still manage to born two babies and still pregnant again,i will advise u divorce him before he kills u.

  • I’m sorry to year that my dear. You are so young and beautiful. The way i see he beats you made me cry. Because i had seen the same thing that went between my mom and dad. But, i know that it is dangerous.
    Please take a time to think of your life, your kids and family. And try to speak to him softly, but if it doesn’t work, immediately report it to the police and his parents. This is a kind of violence, and it’s very dangerous. After you have reported it to the police, ask him for divorce in front of them. if you do it alone, i’m sure he will hide everything you have, you keys, etc.. I’m sorry that you are suffering. And also it will be good to take your kids with you to stay with your mom.

    Don’t wait so long for him to beat you again.
    I’m sorry dear. God will grant you wisdom and every problems will be solved. Keep praying.

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