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Dear MIM Readers: It’s Hard To Leave My Baby Daddy Who Is A …..

Dear MIM Readers: It’s Hard To Leave My Baby Daddy Who Is A …..

I have been living with my baby daddy for 4 years with a set of twin girls who just turned two.

First, my baby daddy is the sweetest person on earth when sober but literally changes when drunk. What I have passed through in his hands, I cannot express in words; from beatings to verbal abuse even while pregnant.

We literally don’t have anything to call our own since all he does is drink up all his money and pay back the  loan he took but never did anything with it. He has lost four very good jobs in a span of four years. I left him before but he claimed to have become saved for almost a year but months after we got back, he started drinking again.

Right now, I am staying with his parents and thinking of leaving my home for good. Last Sunday, he came storming into the church and beat me up claiming that I took his ATM card without his permission, yet he gave it to me himself even before his mum. He is very good when broke but as soon as money comes in he becomes someone else. My dad has called me for a job back home that will last for two weeks and I’m supposed to come back. My problem is my dad is diabetic and has high blood pressure and the last thing I want to do is add more stress to him. I don’t have a job yet (I am a graduate). I don’t want to come back here and keep on being used as a house girl for my in-laws and a punching bag for my baby daddy. What should I do to raise my kids and also not offend my inlaws who have been good to me and are also best friends with my family?

View Comments (23)
  • Since your in laws has been good to you, get them to talk to their son and it is also good for the man to sign an undertaking that he won’t beat you again. Find a way to get money and start a business and also search for a job well well. Good luck

  • From your writeup I can deduce he hasn’t fully married you yet so why allow him turn you to a punching bag and being molested? Please leave him alone before he kills you in his drunken state. Please try get something doing no matter how small so you can be able to cater for your kids. If you know you can turn to a prayer warrior then its ok for you to hang in there but if not its time to take a walk.

  • So sad. Please go back to your Dad. Get a job. Forget him before he kills you. Take ur twins with you.

  • U better go back to your family madam before this beast kills you. U can be close to his family from afar.

  • If ur to be inlaws love u so much they would not object u leaving to get a life for ur children and urself.get a job,get a place for urself call them up and tel them how grateful u are for all they’ve done but u have to stay away from him due to his violent attitude.u are not married to him and officialy u are not their daughter inlaw so u don’t owe anyone anything.

  • He’s not ur husband my dear move on get a job and take care of ur kids before u will b pounce to death

  • The true value of a real man is known when his pockets r filled…that’s to tell you what kind of a man he is…..”drunkard & wife beater”….sorry abt that….but the truth is…get something doing(get a job,b diligent)…if for nothing….@least for your children

  • It’s good you find your way out. There’s literally no good marriage foundation in your relationship with your man. You are just being used. Go fend for your kids. You have to forge ahead. He needs serious deliverance.

  • Please go back to your father’s house b4 he kills you. And come to think of it why baby daddy instead of husband? He haven’t done anytin yet so do u expect such a person to take u serious? Please go back for ur own peace of mind

  • Mama’s here have all said it all so please consider your life and that of your kids b4 dying in an unhealthy relationship.

  • You not even married to him yet you tolerate all these mess? Move back to your father ‘s house and find something doing however little.

  • He hasn’t married you yet so u don’t have in-laws(maybe that’s what is making you endure all these rubbish).Please get a life before he kills u in his drunk state

  • It is after you due that u will know what to do. Will your in laws allow their daughter to live the kind of life u are living now

  • First of all you don’t have a home nor in laws, don’t flatter yourself and don’t fool yourself by saying he is nice when sober and broke because you deserve better. Get out of there with your children, your children are girls what example do you want them to grow up with?

    • Thanks a lot for being honest, what are we talking about here???? You don’t have any home or lover. Period!!!

  • Those girls deserve better, don’t give them the impression that it’s ok to stay with an abusive guy. This guy isn’t even your husband to start with. Get on your feet and empower yourself, women of 2015 don’t depend on men anymore. We work our ass off to foot our bills and take care of our kids when necessary.

  • It’s better u leave to ur parents houz ad find somting to doin to get some earnings,cos stayin at ur inlaws houz wil alwaz give room fr ur baby daddy to come ad beat u up ad dat wil b very bad fr ur kids as dey are growing up,seeing u guyz in such situation will be bad fr deir future.de earlier u leave de better fr u ad ur kids

  • my dear leave dat house . go get ur life back..get a small job n move on.except u dont want ur kids to have d best of lives…

  • He’ not ur husband yet and ur in-laws will not live ur life for u. Pls dear leave, get a job, take care of urself and d twins. It’s well

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