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5 Ways To Earn Your In-laws’ Respect

5 Ways To Earn Your In-laws’ Respect

There’s a popular saying that goes “when you marry your spouse, not only do you marry them, you marry their family.” This is so true. The same way you respect your husband or wife, should be the same way you respect in-laws. Of course, no situation is perfect, and we all know there are some in-laws that can be just plain difficult, no matter how much respect you show them.

Either way, it is you and your spouse’s responsibility to ensure peace reigns between both of your families. Here are a couple of tips on how to earn your in-laws’ respect.

  • Work With Your Partner to Ensure Peace Reigns

This is rule number one. Your partner is your only concern in this game. Do not put your partner in a situation where he or she has to choose between you and a relative. Work with your husband to ensure a that peace reigns between you and your in-laws. It’s easier said than done, but this is where love, compromise, and consideration come in.

  • Set And Enforce Boundaries 

Keeping in mind that it is your home and your family, set rules and boundaries that your in-laws must respect, and enforce them when the need arises. If you don’t like people dropping by at your house unannounced, make it clear to them, and enforce this at every chance you get. Let your husband know how you feel and reach a middle ground with him. If need be, let him communicate this visitation policy to his family, as he knows best how to communicate with them.

  • Be Realistic

Your thoughts or ideas of what your in laws should be like might differ when you actually meet your in-laws. Do not judge them based on thoughts, ideas or dreams you have built up over the years. Learn to get with the programme, everybody might not be as warm as you want. Having a firm grasp of reality will help you deal better with situations, when they come your way.

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  • Know How To Cool-Off

Know when to correct your in-laws and when to bite your tongue. It is not necessary to correct their every fault. Keep in mind that not all of them are children. Sometimes, they already know when they have gone wrong, and are to ashamed to come out and apologize for it. You pointing out every little wrong doing, might make them despise you more than take a liking to you.

  • Be Mature

Maturity comes in when you realize fully that your in-laws are not bound by any rule or law to like or love you. Be sure to understand that, so that you would be saving your self a lot of heartache and pressure. Do not be offended if some in-laws are not as kind as you are towards them. You need to realize that you and them are probably coming from two different worlds entirely, and so background, culture, and life experiences may cause people to act in certain ways you may not be used to. Realizing this will enable you handle any disagreements with maturity, and at the end of the day, they will respect and admire your way of handling things.

View Comments (7)
  • That saying about being married to a family is so African! I don’t believe in it. I believe in respecting people because they are human beings in the first place! Walking on egg shells because of the ‘title’ attached to a human being, ‘in law ‘ is something I don’t do.
    Respect is also reciprocal. I’m all out for respecting the women married to my brothers, and they do the same to me. I do not have unnecessary expectations from them because they are married into my father’s family.
    That is what I believe and see as right.
    Whatever problem any in law can pose can be handled as a problem in human relations . I’ll handle it as I do any external conflict. Peace is what I hope to achieve. I have peace in myself and goodwill towards others. Living in peace with others is a decision everyone should make,, whether you are the one married into a family, or you are an ‘inlaw’.

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