Dear MIMsters: How My Dear Mother Is Ripping My Home Apart
My dear mother is ripping my home apart. I need advice and suggestions and how to manage the aftermath.
I am a 37 year old and been married now for 4 years without a child with my husband. I had a child 16-years-ago for a man who is now late. My husband also has a daughter who lives with us.
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My mum called my husband and told him my daughter is a witch and said a lot of stuff that really scared my husband and told him not to tell me. I noticed my husband’s behavior changed drastically during that period. He got offended easily and would sometimes reject my food and no longer asked about my daughter.
Months later, when he could no longer hide it anymore, he told me what my mother told him – that my daughter is a witch, and advising him not to get close to her.
All these while my daughter has been living with her paternal grandmother in Lagos. After hearing this from my husband, I cried and wailed, sad that my own mother could do this to me.
Then, I called my sister and and told her everything in tears. My sister confronted my mum who denied saying those things, thereby calling my husband a liar. I was dumbfounded and confused. Meanwhile, my home has been boiling.
Later, the truth was revealed when my mum admitted she told my husband those painful things about my daughter.
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But this is what it has degenerated to: I want my daughter around me, but my husband has said no, threatening to institute a divorce if I bring her to live with us. My daughter is just 16, at the stage where she needs proper guidance and a strong parental presence in her life. My heart beats for her but I am so afraid and confused about what to do.
So sorry for this! You have to forgive your mother's loosed mouth!
1, Call your husband and talk to him , asking him if he know if what your mother said was really true or did he just want that as an excuse to keep your daughter out of your sight? after you hear his answer then tell him that ,as you kindly & lovingly welcomed his own child that he should also welcome your child because you cant be far from her and there's no way you have to ignore your child that is now in the most time that she need your mothering care and love out there and loving guide his, no way! 2, he should accept your child and you two as a husband & wife will care for their children ,let him help you by standing by you to raise the kids (his & yours) together ! 3, if he disagree please by no means DO NOT LEAVE YOUR OWN BLOOD OUT THERE IN THE COLD BECAUSE OF A SELFISH MAN. you have a lot to gain by guiding your child and loving her than by keeping her out n the cold while leaving with a selfish man! you child will give you what that man will not give you! DO YOU WANT YOUR OWN BLOOD ..THE CHILD YOU CARRIED FOR 9 MONTHS AND BIRTH TO BE YOUR ENEMY because A MAN? think deep now , this man gave you two things to choose , give him also two things to choose which is to accept your child as you did his or to also go ! because we're talking about your pains , your blood and your joy to come here! take your child to a good pastor , let your husband follow you so that what the pastor will say he will also hear it! or did he think he will harm the child as she is 16? if that's his fear , he should tell you! then you will advise him to see the child as his ,so he won't harm her! THIS IS YOUR ONLY CHILD (though for now) but then YOU DON't know TOMORROW! grace!
my dota is paramount . if he truly loves you , he will accept your dota . even with what your mum told him, you both can solve it ,if its actually true. she is your second half. when no one is there .A dota will always be around .
Really sad that a mother can cause so much issues in her daughter’s marriage.
My advice, prayerfully with God’s wisdom talk to your husband. Your daughter needs a father, he should see it as an opportunity to help model the young girl’s life. Let him know that together, you both can bring up the two kids to be the best they can be, trusting God for other siblings.
Please be strong, no matter his reaction, dont abandon your daughter. She needs you very much and how she turns out in future will depend alot on the present.
God will surely see you through.
are you sure that's your biological mum?
your husband is important, yes, but your daughter is too. Still plead with him. But whatever the outcome do not leave your daughter to herself.
Ur mum has loosed mouth
Your mother might be the actual person behind your predicaments as she could be the one that is possessed. In addition, she might not be happy seeing you married again after losing your husband. Moreso, you need prayers to reveal the type of woman your mother is. God will give you peace and victory.