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Dear Mimsters: I hate myself for loving women. How do I stop?

Dear Mimsters: I hate myself for loving women. How do I stop?

I am a girl in my twenties. I have been single for sometime now. I travelled to another country to go and study. And I fell for my classmate who is in her late thirties and is married with a child. I have been so confused because I never ever thought I had a thing for women. I have never been a lesbian or even a bisexual.

I have always dated men so I can’t understand my sudden attraction to women. More so, why was it never like that back in my own country. Anyways, she was an extreme narcassist and a gaslighter but was also such a sweet loving woman. I have never loved anyone or shared this kind of bond with anyone except her. We had some kind of a soul connection. It felt so deep and amazing and different. I could literally die for her; that is how much I love her and I’m so fond of her. She was a mother, a friend, lover and a sister. She meant the world to me!

One thing led to another and I found out her narcissistic nature was a threat to my sense of being, so I had to let go. I haven’t heard from her ever again. She blocked me on all social media platforms but that is ok. I have moved on but the truth is I haven’t gotten over her.

I am confused about my sexuality now and I hate myself for loving women. Not a single day passes without me thinking about her. And the worst happened today; a woman visited my workplace and when I saw her, I knew there was something that strikes me about her. I had to do a treatment on her and I can’t even deny I have fallen a bit for her and can’t get her off my mind. She is about 40.

This is already happening while I am struggling to get the other one out of my mind. I’m just tired of life and tired of myself. Men don’t excite me anymore, for whatever reason, I don’t know.

Please help me!

View Comments (6)
  • I have found myself falling for women and I still do. How I end up not doing anything with them or getting over them is something I can’t explain. I can relate totally with what you’re going through but how to help you is what I don’t know. I think you need to go for counseling first.

  • Short of word…. just cast your cares on the LORD and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken.

  • I was once in your shoes, I allowed myself to be influenced by my environment. It’s just a phase and it will pass. Just try as much as possible to be closer to God, love Him with the whole of your heart, because when you love someone, you try as much as possible not to hurt the person. You loving God will at least restrain you you from such practices, knowing that your body is the temple of God and shouldn’t be desecrated. Good luck

  • My sister this is the work of the devil I know you are aware that God is against lesbianism the best thing you can do now is to involve ur self in a personal prayer session to break every chain that keeps you attracted to women In other to loose heaven may God hear your cry

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