Dear MIMsters: He’s Got all the Great Qualities But this One Important Thing Makes Me Want to Quit

I am 28, my fiance is 33. He has all the great qualities any woman would want in a man; a good job, good personality, caring, hardworking, God fearing, and is not a womaniser.

When people see us together, they always envy us, but deep down within me, I feel so disappointed. He makes me feel miserable in the bedroom because he’s a straight to sex kind of man. He doesn’t kiss, won’t touch me down there, not to talk of sucking me down there.

He only manages to suck my breast for about a second and then straight to sex. I have talked to him twice about this and all he could say was that he is an HSE (Health Safety and Environment) person and he’s very conscious of his health. So he avoids all those things to prevent bacteria infection.

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I told him, it’s not right for him to practice HSE in the bedroom with his woman, leaving me hanging all the time but he said it’s his career and he’s used to it. There are times he would release, I won’t know and I’m still positioned for doggy, only to hear the sound of him showering in the bathroom.

After taking his bath, he would go to the sitting room to watch film leaving me miserable on the bed. I’ve cheated on him twice with someone else and it felt like I had never had sex before.

He proposed to me last week. I accepted the ring because it was in a public place and I didn’t want to make a mess of him. My family feels he’s a good and perfect candidate for a husband. Nobody seems to understand me. In short, they’re all telling me sex is not food and I should teach him.

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Actually, I tried to teach him but he said he understands what I want but because of his HSE knowledge he can’t do all those things. Yet, he asks me to suck him, with a promising to retaliate. When I’m sucking him, he enjoys it but when I’m about rounding up, he acts like he’s snoring.

I’m worried because he does not want to change. Should I ignore that aspect of him and go on with the marriage or should I quit? I’m contemplating quitting since nobody wants to understand me.

9 Discussions on
“Dear MIMsters: He’s Got all the Great Qualities But this One Important Thing Makes Me Want to Quit”
  • Babe,receive sense in Jesus name, whoever told you sex is not fool is a liar from the pit of hell,Omo na food o,and he is not ready to change and you have cheated on him twice,if you eventually marry him because of all other good things and neglect d sex part you will become adulterous and the people who said sex is not food will be the one to crucify you first,a beg give yourself brain.

  • Better quit now that you cannot cope than be miserable later. How long do you want to be cheating on him? Will you cheat when married?

  • This is very very controversial indeed. Had it been he makes you come by any means other than penetration it would have been better. And now you have started cheating already. How long will you continue to cheat? It’s better you quit if you can’t persevere

  • Hmmm,my dear sex is very important and vital in. Marriage..Cos with ur post it shows U enjoy real good sex and dis ur man isn’t satisfying U..Me I like heading and my hubby doesn’t like doing it wen we were dating..But I had to insist cos I told him blankly dat he would make me desire another man,and he started trying it,now he’s a “pro’..So try and have a a heated talk about the sex thing and see if there’ll be any difference..

  • Please quit,hez selfish..hez gonna learn the hard way dt good sex is important in a relationship wen u quit him. U already cheatg on him nw,i see no future in ur marriage unless he truly change.

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