This has been a sensitive issue among couples and medical experts in the last few decades. Before the roaring 70s, men were sent away by the midwives. Sometime in the early 70s, Doctor Robert Bradley started inviting husbands into the birthing room. By the late 70s, it had become an unwritten requirement that men be present while their wives gave birth.
What’s the rationale for this development? Let’s examine some reasons why men should be present during delivery.
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Familiarity Breeds Calm
Before the 70s when it became imperative that women give birth in hospitals, men were still not encouraged to come see their wives give birth. The women who weren’t used to the surroundings couldn’t relax for the contractions to take place. As a result, Dr Robert Bradley in 1962 suggested that the husbands come in to talk to their wives and calm them. Although some gynaecologists did not agree, they did find out that there was a reduction in prolonged labour and the need for intervention or assistance like caesarean operations.
By the 70s, women could not fathom giving birth without their husbands being present. It had become a doctrine.
Preparation for Fatherhood
Some men and marriage counsellors think that it will be helpful if the fathers-to-be were present during their children’s delivery in order for them to be better prepared for the role of fatherhood. Physically present to witnessing such an amazing thing as a child coming into the world creates the pathway to establishing a bond with the new born.
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To witness the emotions and energy, that first cry, can be a life-changing experience that makes the father immediately bond with the newborn.
Experts and older couples believe that many married couples today are not mentally and spiritually mature enough for marriage or parenthood. Some of these also agree that in order to have a deep and mature relationship, the husband and father to be should be able to embrace womanhood in its totality. What other way can a man embrace womanhood from a deeper perspective than witnessing her give birth?
Cosmopolitan asked some fathers how they felt on witnessing their wife give birth. One of them had this to say: “I saw my daughter’s first breath, I watched an event I managed to avoid during high school health class (It wasn’t that bad!), and I witnessed a kind of strength and resilience in my wife that left me in awe of what she could do. I can’t imagine not being there”. (www.cosmopolitan.com)
One of the fathers interviewed by cosmopolitan said, “I saw my wife tear apart like tissue paper. I never knew skin could do that!”. Fact is, you cannot witness something like that and not be sensitive to the needs of your wife when she gets home.
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According to www.psychologytoday.com, when women that had epistomy-assisted childbirth experienced frequent incidence of pain during intercourse. Men were also said to feel their wives pain.
On the whole, men have confessed that witnessing their wife was anything but overwhelming. The argument is strong on both sides.
Some men and women don’t think that men should be present during delivery. They believe it’s absolutely unnecessary.
On the other hand, many men and women think it’s a wonderful thing for the father to witness his child coming into the world. It helps strengthen he bond between both parents and that between the new dad and his newborn.
Tags: delivery room, fathers
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They’re always there lately.
My husband is most definitely going to be with me in the birthing room.
he must be with me
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