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Dear MIMsters: Am I Being Inconsiderate By Taking This Drastic Step?

Dear MIMsters: Am I Being Inconsiderate By Taking This Drastic Step?

Hello Mimsters, I would really appreciate some advice. I’m not sure if I am being inconsiderate and harsh.

There was a period I was so depressed because I was denied my residential permit. I couldn’t visit my home country without it because I would have been fined – it began to affect my family.

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I was always angry and my baby was the victim. I would push her away and sometimes beat her whenever she came close to me. My mother-in-law was living with us then, she still is. She has made my life a living hell, especially that period. It’s unbearable. She doesn’t eat my food and she tells her children that I starve her, when I have never done that.

My sister-in-law supports her mother and has also made my life unbearable. She would call my husband to complain that I was maltreating her mother, and also threatene to deal with me. My husband has called family members to come and take her, but none of them has agreed to do that.

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I feel like it would be immature of me to call my family and tell them how my mother-in-law and sister-in-law have been maltreating me. The last thing that I want to do is stress them out, as a result I feel so lonely because I have no one to talk too.

My husband has been supportive: he is always on my side.  His mother dares not insult me in his presence. I have tried my best to impress her, but it barely moves her. I have run out of ways to make her like me, she is just a difficult person.

I decided to go back to my country in December with or without the permit, I even made plans to book the tickets, but somehow, my documents came through and it gave some form of relief.

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I took a break and visited my family for a few months, just to have a breather. When I got back from my trip, things got worse. It was so bad that my mother-in-law flogged me and beat me up, I had to spend a few days in the hospital.

Now, I have tried not to make my husband choose between his family and I, but I think it’s about time that I draw the line. I have planned to call the whole family to tell them to count me out of their family affairs, they should never come near me or my children again.

I am fed up don’t want poisonous people around me anymore. As for my mother-in-law, I don’t want to be part of her miserable life anymore, and quite frankly, I don’t want to know when she dies. As for my husband, he can continue being part of their lives, but I am done.

My question is: am I being selfish or inconsiderate by taking this big decision?

View Comments (2)
  • For taking this decision they must have pushed you to the wall so I don’t blame you. Do what you want please. Do not displease yourself to please others.

  • I have been in this case before with my wife. don’t try to please her, do the little you can and leave the rest. don’t stress yourself anyhow. report the abuse to your husband and both of you should tell the family members you are done taking care of her and since they love her they should take care of her because she has done the worst. if your husband refuses do as you said.

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