Dos and Don’ts: Healthy Bedroom Secrets Every Couple Should Know

Ineh Olisah

Been married for a while now and it looks like the flames that once sparked your marriage is gradually fading away? Here are some bedrooms secrets, grouped into Dos and Don’ts, to help put back the spark in your marriage.


  1. Create intimacy by having physical contact with each other as much as you can. Physical touch serves as an assurance of your commitment to each other.
  2. Love and show your wife or husband respect.
  3. Encourage your spouse’s sexual advances because sex creates intimacy in marriage.
  4. Add some spontaneity to your sex and romance. Jump at your spouse when he least expects it.
  5. Stay sexy for your husband, not taking him for granted by making yourself less attractive after marriage and having kids. Men are visual and are attracted to what they see.
  6. Flirt and laugh with your wife. Having a great sense of humour is a good recipe for a healthy marriage.
  7. Have a perfume that you use when you are in the mood for it, so when he gets a whiff of it, he knows what’s next to do.
  8. Invest in some sexy lingerie that flatters your figure.
  9. Make love at unusual times other than at night shortly before falling asleep. Treat your spouse to an erotic afternoon after serving her some aphrodisiac snack.
  10. Lie naked in bed with your spouse and just talk. This is a great time to re-bond.
  11. Tell your spouse you love them when they least expect it.

READ ALSO: Nathaniel Bassey on Overcoming Challenges in Their 5 Year Marriage


  1. Allow whatever differences you have affect your sex life, because if it does, that spells the beginning of doom in the marriage.
  2. Always be so predictable. Dish out pleasant surprises as this helps to keep the romance alive.
  3. Constantly nag and criticize your wife or husband. Studies have shown that a man’s libido is directly connected to his ears, therefore criticizing him could make him feel incompetent and he’ll give you a zero response. Same goes for a woman.
  4. Sweat the petty stuffs. Avoid being petty and learn to appreciate the good things your spouse does to build a healthy marriage.
  5. Go to bed with a frown. Loving couples make it a point to kiss and make up in the bedroom before retiring to sleep at night.
  6. Leave your bedroom looking like it has been recently bombed, an untidy and unclean space may turn off the most attractive man.
  7. Always wait for your man to make the first move. A confident man loves his woman taking the initiative.
  8. Kill the love making mood by using clinical language to mention body parts. Be creative in using fun phrases to describe actions and the body parts involved.
  9. Ignore your partner’s needs and wants. Encourage him or her to show you what they want and enjoy. Be open to tell him what he can do to give you the pleasure you deserve.
  10. Never should you compare your partner’s bedroom skills with your former lover’s. Live in and enjoy the moment.
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