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Dear MIMsters: How Do I Accept My Husband’s Crazy Fantasies and Live With It?

Dear MIMsters: How Do I Accept My Husband’s Crazy Fantasies and Live With It?

How do I accept my husband’s crazy fantasies and live with it like it is okay? At the same time, I do not want my son to grow up in a broken home.

I was touched by the man who wrote about his wife he has not had sex with for 3 years now because through his phone, his wife caught him cheating with women.

Well most women will agree that this is no new news. I for one have been a victim of this situation during  my early stage of marriage and it almost affected my pregnancy. I posted this earlier on this platform.

READ ALSO: Dear MIMsters: Am I wrong to not want a ‘happy home’ like my parent-in-laws?

Going forward, my husband promised me that he’s a changed man. This was a year ago, but unfortunately he hasn’t as I still caught him this year. I got the revelation that he has a thing for nudes and pornography and other illicit acts which I can’t mention.

Since he has this perception that wives are holy and he can’t involve wifey in these illicit act, he has chosen to seek after girls who are willing to do them for money.

Now the issue is me, as a woman, I have my own fantasies as well but I choose to kill them out of love and respect for my husband. Anytime I try to enact those things he fantasizes about, he gives me the impression that he is not into things like that.

But now, he is begging me to accept him the way he is and said that the day he involves me in those his acts, it will be the end of our marriage because I will no longer be pure to him. For me to now get this revelation after marriage and after two years puts me at a place where I don’t know if I should hate him or love him.

READ ALSO: 5 Signs You Are In A Destructive Marriage

I am really trying to just accept it because I don’t want my son grow without having both parents. Often, I feel deceived and know I deserve better. I have sacrificed a lot and still sacrificing a lot for this marriage and yet I don’t get the fulfillment as a wife. I need good counsel and please people with similar experience should tell me what they did.

View Comments (4)
  • I think your husband really needs help here. Is in big shit of addiction(sexual). And your marriage is really at risk, sorry to say that. You both need a serious conversation. Pray God gives you wisdom.

  • I would rather my son grow without both parents for my sanity than allow one man continually disrespect me and give me high blood pressure.

  • Why shouldn’t u live oit ypur sexual fantasies too?
    He is a selfish man but on the other hand, he needs to be edicated that sex is not dirty. So those things he is doing outside, he should do them with u as long as you are okay with it.

    Abeg life is too short o.
    Push for what you want, in a way that is not angry or aggressive. Talk with him. Let him know in a very loving way that he is not thr only one capable of ending the marriage.

    The truth is you have needs and u can’t shut out those needs for the rest of your marriage (babe do you know how many years that will be?)

    No one will want you to leave your marriage like that but you just might end up dping so if u feel super frustrated down the line amd u dnt need any reason to cheat on him too.

    So sit your husband down and talk to him
    Dnt feel afraid abt ur sexuality

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