Dear MIMsters: My Late Husband’s Family Demands I Give Them A Male Child Before This Happens

I need your good advice on this my issue. Should I give in the demands of my late husband’s family?

I got married in 2011 and joined my husband in Australia in that same year. I became pregnant but lost that pregnancy after a few months.

At the end of 2012, he traveled to Nigeria to complete his building in Lagos. When he was away, I noticed that I was pregnant, called him and we celebrated on phone. Three months later, he returned to Australia, sick. He was vomiting and had a fever. We went to the hospital but the problem could not be identified.

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A few weeks later he started vomiting blood. I rushed him to the hospital and after several tests were carried out on him, we confirmed that he was poisoned. The poison had damaged his liver and kidneys. They couldn’t function properly anymore. He was placed on medications and treatments but died later, even though the doctors who are professionals did their best.

To me his illness was not a medical issue but a spiritual one. He must have been attacked spiritually when he went to Nigeria. His corpse was flown to Nigeria for funeral arrangement. I was very heavy then, so I could not go with his younger brother who lived here with us. Also I would not be allowed to fly because of my condition.

A few months after the burial, I gave birth to a baby girl. My family and inlaws were very happy. Now, it’s been two years, six months since my husband died and God has been there for me and my little girl.

Now, the problem is my inlaws said if I want to inherit all my husband’s properties in Nigeria, I must bear them a male child. Bear them a male child or forget about his properties, or remain in their family and look for a way to get them a baby boy, or single handedly take care of my daughter (they said when she’s grown, she will come to look for them). My own family does not want this. They say that I am too young to be facing such a thing.

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At 29, my family wants me to move on with my life. I even have suitors asking for my hand in marriage here in Australia, both white and black). Everything my husband worked for in the past years has been under the control of his elder brother. As I write, my husband left nothing for me and our baby but the God of the fatherless child and a widow has proven himself since my husband died. I have achieved a lot. I have done many things for myself, my family and even for my angel.

What would you do if you were in my situation? Should I listen to my in-laws or to my family?

32 Discussions on
“Dear MIMsters: My Late Husband’s Family Demands I Give Them A Male Child Before This Happens”
  • Listen t your family and let that evil family be. It’s obvious they killed your husband to inherit those properties. Allow them be and let God fight your battles. Cut off all ties with them for now for your own good.

  • yea may b dey want u to beat a son true ur husbands brother….my dear move on with life.u have suitors den move on with one.

  • They poisoned him so they can take all your husband worked for.Move on with your life.Please ignore them,leave vengeance for God,work and take care of your daughter.God will see you through.

  • My dear don’t allow those inlaws to take advantage of your innocence. Don’t try that rubbish they asking from you. Move on and get married to someone else. Thank God you are doing well for youself so you don’t need to put yourself through that nonsense because of material stuff. So move and God will bring better things than the one your late hubby left behind.

  • Move on life holds better things in stock for u leave whatever ur husband has for his family get married znd have a beautiful life u deserve the best my dear good will pay your husband people in their own coin I belive they are responsible for his death jst to collect his properties nay God direct u

  • Plz just let them be, they purposely killed him cos of the properties God wil fight for you just stay away as far as u can

  • Even if you had boys before the demise of your husband, they will still not give you anything. Don’t yield to your in-laws request if you don’t want to be in their eternal slavery cause I’m sure they won’t give you anything. Just move on, greater husband awaits you.

  • A word is enough for the wise. Dear move on. All the properties are earthly possession, as long as you are alive and almighty God is alive, you will acquire more IJN.. Forget the past and move on. The family of your late husband is in now in your past. Look into the future. God you and your little angel.

  • they have said it all,i have nothing more to say. Really u are young to face all dis,u have many more years to live happily instead of in pains

  • pls my dear,run for you dear life,how do they expect you to give them the male child? by sleeping with them or you get it anywhere? abeg run

  • Are you a baby making machine?
    I beg forget that retched family and live your life…… Is the girl not a human?
    I beg pack well joor

  • ? I don’t understand oops you are doing well and suitors are asking for your hand in marriage….my dear the answer is right in front of your eyes

  • My dear, kindly move on! If the members of that family wished you well at all, they would not have given you such conditions! Thank God for blessing you with a child. Soon they will want to inherit you as a wife

  • Please don’t go outside and get pregnant. The right thing is that they should leave something for you to use and take care of your child instead of saying you should go out and get pregnant. Please feel free to move on with your life. You are too young to go through such. You can remarry if you so wish afterall even if you have a son outside and wish to remarry, they would still demand you leave all your late husband’s properties. It’s better to have your own husband since you have mourned enough.

  • Sorry about your loss dear. But please move on with your life. Dont stress yourself over what is temporal. God has been keeping you, He will continue to do so.

  • Dear poster, am gonna sound rash a bit but not before extending my sympathies.
    You yourself have said the God of fatherless has been with you and you have achieved a lot. So what are your concern with your late Husband’s properties? Do you know that the bible says till death do you part? If one party dies in a marriage the other is free to move on.
    Please forget the past and drive on to the future. If you eventually want to give them a boy, am sure it is from the Elder brother of your late husby or you bore them a son from outside? Dont you think that will label you a whore if you bring a son from outside? By then you will lose both ways.
    Biko nne, move on. Let them be with their problem.
    If the properties of your late husband is what will give them everlasting happiness, let it be then.
    Get a good man and settle down again. Ndo

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