Dear MIMsters: I Took a Loan to Help Hubby. Now That He’s Rich, See What He’s Doing to Me

I took a loan to help hubby, now that he’s rich, see what he’s doing to me.

I am 33 years old and my husband is 37. We have 3 kids, 9, 6,  and a 3 months old.

I met my husband when he was at training college in 2001 . He approached me and told me he wanted to marry me. By then I had completed senior high school and wanted to further to training college. My husband did not have money, but I managed with him. So, I took him to meet my parents who also accepted him as he was. He claimed to have money set aside for our wedding rites, but when time came, he couldn’t come up with any money. So, my parent and I managed to do everything since the invitations had been sent out already.

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We started our lives with a lot of financial crisis which led us to a whole lots of problems. So after my completion at the training college, I helped hubby further his education in one of our universities in Ghana. I bought him forms and took a loan for him to start his education. There wasn’t any single year that I didn’t take a loan for him. Thank God he graduated in 2008 and  thanks to one man who came in to help take him out of the country. He went to the UK and left us here. At the beginning, he was calling and sending things to us, until one day. I went into my husband’s Facebook account and found out that he had tagged in a lady. I asked him and he said they are just friends and nothing else. Later, I decided to check the lady’s pics on Facebook and I saw so many pictures of my husband with the lady in display. I got mad and started calling my husband but he didn’t pick .

So, I sent a message to the lady that my husband is married to me and we have kids together. The lady started telling me that my husband told her he is not married, that he divorced me because I left him for another man . So I called my mother-in-law and other people to talk to him. But the lady told me she was pregnant for him which was confirmed as true by one of my husband’s friends. I managed with this because I was still in the university furthering my education. It’s wasn’t easy but I managed with him.

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Hmmmm!!!! I was there one day thinking my husband had changed for the better since he pleaded with me to forgive him. He called and told me he will be coming to Ghana after living in the UK for five years. When he returned, he didn’t look for the kids and I. He came and his junior brother rented an apartment for him. I would call but he wouldn’t pick. He didn’t call until he came home one afternoon, a week after. He didn’t touch nor did he sleep with me, so, I asked him why he is ignoring me? He claimed he tracked my phone lines and he saw my love messages to my boy friends. Being in school, I use some words like dear, sweety etc which I thought was normal for both male and female friends that I have on campus.

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Then later said he doesn’t feel anything anymore for me because I have grown fat. It’s a lie. I nearly died because I was shocked and couldn’t bear the pain. Later, he came to apologize to me that he was sorry, not knowing my husband came to  Ghana to pick a lady to go with him to his place in the UK. I found the lady’s number and I contacted her. The lady said my husband said he has already divorced me and that we only have two kids. I explained everything to the lady, but she got angry and started giving it to me that my husband said that I am a thief and a prostitute. She insulted me saying that I am foolish to be in Ghana calling him my husband.

He came down one day and made love to me which lead to my third pregnancy after which he left for the U S. Later, the lady called to beg that she is sorry for breaking my home. My biggest worry is that my husband cannot show me off as his wife on Facebook or any other social media. He doesn’t involve me in his decisions or projects that he’s doing. He rented a place for me and later brought his people to stay there with me.

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I am so confused and unhappy. I planned to move out and also end this unhappy marriage, but my mother keeps telling me to be patient because my husband is now rich. He has built a house for his family and he’s now on his. I am working as a graduate teacher. The truth is he takes care of his kids but I am emotionally not happy. Please advice me.

45 Discussions on
“Dear MIMsters: I Took a Loan to Help Hubby. Now That He’s Rich, See What He’s Doing to Me”
  • Dear sister, u don’t nid a soothsayer on dis issue, dis ur so-called husband used you in attaining his height, u had better move on,#myopinion#. But come to think of it u never know how it is like till u get dere. God have mercy

  • Hnmmmm I wonder why sm men do change whn de start making money it only takes de grace of God 4 a man to remember where he’s coming frm weda rich or bad. Hnmm my dear I wuldnt wanna imagine myself in dis kinda mess cus its hurtful but all I kw is God gonna pay evrybdy in his/her own coin. Plz try make urself happy for de sake of ur kids n live a happy life no matter whts goin on ok one day he will realise hw important u re to him n I jst pray it won’t be too late 4 him.

  • Dear poster, do not worry KARMA is going to take its course in no time. With KARMA, u get served what u deserve. If u can, move out of that unhappy union and live your life. Life is too short to be unhappy

  • its a diecy issue I just think you should pray more,make ur joy Paramount to anything else and again avoid that house if the presence of his people make you unhappy, be strong get another apartment for u and your kids don’t brake up with him just don’t make him the center of your joy

  • Its a pity madam. Just don’t worry God in his infinite mercy will see u through. Just keep hope alive, try and be happy with yourself 4 d sake of ur kids. it is well with u.

  • Am soory if am harsh but ur hubby is a gold digger even the other his milking her
    .ur the one that wears shoes so the decision is urs.all i can say is dont let any man take u for granted

  • Am soory if am harsh but ur hubby is a gold digger even the other lady he is milking her pocket dry
    .ur the one that wears the shoes so the decision is urs.all i can say is dont let any man take u for granted

  • Na waooo. This is y most men die n will die in poverty bcos y u their wife is busy praying for dem to b comfortable financially, som of dem r busy thinkin of d foolish life dey will live without their wife in consideration. Pls madam, make ursef happy alwyz.

  • Make yourself happy at all times, for your sake n that of your children, I will not advice you to divorce him rather concentrate on ur studies n be happy, its very important you make urself happy no matter the suitation, surround yourself with positive people ,life is way too short , some men are heartless sha

  • This story dey vex me ehn more than pepper on my body sef? Which man are you waiting for the one dat denied you before 2 other ladies? & y on earth did you allow him to make love to you after d way he treated you.thank God you ended wt a baby & not an incurable disease. It pains me so much when ladies allow a man rubbish their life.ita good to fall in love but pls let’s b wise too.pls tell ur mum u 4 not going to eat the money of a man who disrespect u so.he came back to pick ANOTHER lady after d rubbish he tried b4 so what makes you think he has an atom of love & respect for u he just married u in d first place cos maybe ur parents are rich& he saw in u his ticket to a better happy you work.move out of that house cos when d rent expires his pple wl look up to you to u to pay,get a court injuction to make him take care of the kids after all they are his too while you face ur work& take care of urself^ parents. If love knocks on your heart again b careful& choose wisely& remember that ur kids come first therefore if a man does not love or accept them it’s better u stay on ur can b Alone bit not Lonely.look for those things that make you happy & indulge yourself .takia

  • Dear sister, only God can fight for you on this matter. The truth is your husband is ungrateful and I think he’s only looking for excuses to dump you. Thank God you have a job and he’s also taking care of your kids. Pls take care of yourself too and with God on your side, I believe you will attain a greater height in life so that he’ll be hearing of all your greater achievements. Keep parying for him that God will touch his heart but don’t put your life ona stand still

  • Dont even know wat to say
    i feel so pained for u i wil advise u to kip prayin to God nd b strong if nt for anythin for ur kids cos ur husband seems to b possessed.
    I pray he cums to his senses nd soon also bf it wil b too late.

  • Rubbish! You take a lot of trash from him so he treats you anyhow cuz he knows you will accept him. Please leave the an nd move on

  • Please try to make ur self happy because of urs kids forget about dat so called ur ingrate husband move with ur life and be happy almighty will be with u and your kid happiness is the best option first

  • I just weak for men… when I hear people story I feel for my sef and pray more to God that my husband should not change. well my sis pls follow ur hrt

  • focus on your children, pretend as if he doesn’t exist. be happy, live life to the fullest. Life is too short to be this miserable.

  • I don’t think this man has any regard for you. If you can get him to take responsibility for the children,then you can leave. If he truly values you and wants you back,he will come for you.

  • Poster please move on…women should know when to draw the lines, do not allow men to ridicule you….concentrate on your yourself and kids. ..

  • As sad and painful as it is, the marriage is over. Am sad you allowed him touch after all the humiliation. Thank God it’s a baby and not an incurable disease. Thank God you have a job. Do EVERYTHING within your power to be happy, it may be tough, but do it and make sure he takes care of the children. All the best.

  • He is an ingrate and heartless, leave him for God to judge him and u move on wit ur life I knw he’s still cumin back to beg

  • It is written in d bible dat u only leavd ur spouse on d ground of infidelity so my dear I will advice u leave dat marriage life is too short for u to be unhappy

  • My mum is a living testimony to the fact that such men always pay miserably for all those atrocities committed against women. Dnt force yourself on him and focus your energy on other stuff n trust me, he will sure pay.
    Add value to yourself and do your best for your kids, dnt wish him evil n dnt think harm against him, just let God be the one to fight this battle for you…

  • Really sad. Thank God u r working,so anyhow u can cater for ur kids.detach urself emotionally frm him if u can. Accept dt he doesn’t love u for now. If u can detach urself emotionally,u can remain in d marriage. Otherwise,move out. Am nt a supporter of divorce,so I suggest separation. This story is d reason some women dnt wnt dia husbands to b rich. I am just so disgusted by d story. Sorry to say,bt I dnt blame women for dia increased rate in infidelity des days. Cos most men n dia attitudes have made d whole idea of marriage not worth d stress. Abeg na shoulder dem de carry man matter,if e too heavy,u tilt d shoulder down. Otherwise u will die o.

  • I will advice u to divorce him before you die soon. TG u are well educated move out rent an apartment file for divorce and fight for the custody of your kids. better still move away to a far location and end it with him. See u can make it alone okay. Fuck the apologies he will do it everyday he is even disgracing u. Leave him before he takes it to battering u. Who said u can’t live without him. Sweetheart pack and leave and save your children from seeing all these emotional ish

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