Dear MIMsters: I Am Pregnant and Scared and This Is Why

I need your advice on how to handle my depressing current state. I am pregnant and scared.

I am 23 years old and pregnant for my 35 years old boyfriend who still lives in his family house. I do not know where to start but I think I have to walk out of this relationship as I can see it is causing more harm than good to me.

First, we dated for 2 years and during these years, he never told about his health status. In the course of the relationship, I got to know that he has diabetes, pneumonia and appendicitis. I came across his medical records when I was cleaning his house one day.

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Since we’ve been together, we’ve been having one fight or the other. His mother is also a reason as she decides what we eat in the house and what I should cook. She even told me not to live with him, saying that he can’t take care of me and the baby, that I should go back to my parent’s house and look for work.

She runs down her son in my presence and also runs me down in her son’s presence. This got me thinking all time, such that it shot up my blood pressure got very high and I was told I was going to be operated if my blood pressure is hign.

I had to leave his place to return to my parent’s house. I was told to change environment and my mum asked to come so that she can take of me and now, I’m better now.

Now, I’m 36 weeks gone and my guy doesn’t call again me any more. All the items for the baby that we ought to buy are still pending.  The little money money that I gathered when I was still working was what I used to treat myself and to buy a few things. Now, even if I call this guy, he won’t pick my calls neither would he call or call back and won’t reply my messages.

My mum has tried talking to him but it hasn’t changed anything.

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Now, my fear is, after I give birth, how will I cope with the up-keeping of the baby and how will I get all the remaining things that I need for her without a helper? My mum has told me not to call my guy again that I should leave him alone. None of his family members have even called once to ask of me.

I am scared and do not know what to do.

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