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Dear MIMsters: How Do I Handle a Second Break Up In Four Months?

Dear MIMsters: How Do I Handle a Second Break Up In Four Months?

I am dealing with issues for which I need advice. I came out from a toxic relationship four months ago with a guy I started from the scratch with, who when God started blessing him, his attitude towards me changed.

My problem now is that I met a guy who has a shop close to my house and has been asking me out. He’s been asking me out since when I was in that toxic relationship. I declined because I don’t know how to double date. So after I broke up with my ex, I gave this new guy, Femi a chance. We started dating a week ago.

READ ALSO: Dear MIMsters: I Trusted My Husband With My Life, See Where It Left Me

I found out that I like Femi a lot. Recently, he told me he was sick and needed money. I didn’t have any money with me, so I was worried that I could not give him a helping hand. When I called him yesterday morning, we spoke well. But when I tried to call again in the afternoon, he cut my call. I thought he was busy. Later, I tried and tried without success.When he finally picked, he said he was angry with me.

I ran to his workplace, only for him to tell me that he called his ex and told her that he wasn’t fine and she transferred 5k to him. I feel bad because he has blocked my line after ignoring my calls. I feel betrayed.

I have been asking him for my shoes which I left in his house when I went the other week to help him cook, he said he was going to send his boys to send them but he didn’t. When I went to his place, I met his ex with him in his shop and she was feeding him. I felt like the ground should open and swallow me. He pretended like we had nothing together. I just respected myself, took my shoes and left and he didn’t call me afterwards. I texted him online, he read my text but didn’t reply.

My problem now is that I have already slept with Femi, so I feel like I look so cheap. My chest is ripping out. I have told him about my past, my introduction that didn’t work out with my ex due to domestic violence and all, and he assured me that I was in a safe hands.

READ ALSO: Dear MIMsters: What Should I Do to Get Out of This Huge Mess?

I need your advise. How do I handle this break up a second time? People already know that my previous relationship didn’t work out after having the official family introduction and now this? It is very painful and I feel very ashamed.

The reason why I dated him was because of the assurance Femi’s brother gave me about him. He even told me that Femi was in a toxic relationship previously and specifically begged me to be good to him. He was very convincing. Now I feel so betrayed and pained. My chest has been heavy since.

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  • Dear poster, I’m sorry this happened to you. However, by now you should already know your relationship with Femi is over, if you can call what you had with him a relationship in the first place.

    The way I see it, Femi never had good intentions towards you. That he could so casually break up with you because you didn’t have money to give to him when he was sick and also deny your relationship, shows the kind of person he is.

    My advice? Pick your heart up and move on. Also, don’t be so quick to get intimate with a new guy. Take your time to study the new prospect and let his true intentions slowly reveal before committing yourself that way.

    Take the time to completely heal of all pain, hurt, and baggage, and hopefully, love will find you the next time.

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