Dear MIMsters: I Didn’t Listen To My Mum When She Warned Me About Susan, And I Paid Dearly For It (Part One)

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I wished I had listened to my mum when she warned me about Susan, but sadly, I didn’t

Thank you MIM admin for this platform, for it’s been a blessing to me in ways beyond comprehension. I learn, unlearn and relearn through the stories I read on your platform. Having stated that, I would like for your many readers, especially the women-folk to learn a lesson from my story. I wish I knew earlier, maybe it wouldn’t have hurt this much.

Now, though I will be sharing my story unedited; that is, I would spill the whole truth and nothing but the truth, I would want to hold back from mentioning the names involved because they are ardent social media users. Once again, thank you for this platform.

I am married into a closely knitted family. MIL became a widow in her late 20s and she single-handedly raised her four kids without help from her husband’s family members. My husband and his siblings worship the very ground their mom walks on and that is okay with me. I think the woman has been there enough for them to be so loved and appreciated by her children.

MIL has 2 boys and 2 girls. My hubby is her 1st child and he was the last person to get married. He has 2 sisters after him (a set of twins) who were the firsts to get married. The last child of the family got married 6-months before us. I learnt hubby faced a lot of disappointments from women before he met me. He was 38-years old and I was 21-years old when we got married.

My BIL’s wife -the ones who got married 6-months ahead of us- took a liking to me or so I thought. Because she got into the family before me, and she is about 3-years older than me, she assumed responsibilities to tell me about the family we are married into, and to also warn me about how to relate with each one of them.

I became pregnant the very month we got married and elatedly, we told MIL about it. Meanwhile my 6-months senior SIL (let me call her: Susan) was TTC. When I shared our good news with her, she scolded me for telling MIL. She said I would regret telling her if I do not begin to pray earnestly about my condition. Of course, I was scared but brazened up that all would be fine.

A week later, I had a miscarriage. It was like the world crashed on me. My mom was very supportive. I told her what Susan said to me and my mom said I should be careful around someone like Susan.

Susan was also there for me. Always bringing me food and telling me all will be fine. MIL never showed any concern towards me and that made me believe all that Susan told me about her.

I would later have 4 more miscarriages. Then depression set in, hubby became withdrawn from me and drew closer to MIL. He would also most times complained about all I do while comparing me with Susan. He would say even though Susan was also TTC, she was not ostracizing her husband’s family members.

My parents came to take me back home so that they could care for me. Susan would come to visit me and tell me what MIL and everyone have been saying about me. She would pray with me and tell me to be strong. One day, she told me she was going to take me somewhere to get help. I was so stupid I didn’t ask her why she hasn’t gone for help, too. I went with her and we met a prophet who warned me to steer clear of MIL. When I returned home, even though Susan had warned me not to tell my mom because she said she sensed she does not like her, I told her since I couldn’t keep secrets away from her.

My mom warned me again and said she would tell Susan to stop visiting me but I begged her not to. I told her Susan was the only one in my husband’s family who is on my side. My mom obliged me but said if she comes around again, she would not excuse us to talk.