There’s A Lot To Learn From How Veteran Broadcaster, Funmi Iyanda Helped Her Cook’s 4-Year-Old Ditch Throwing Tantrums

Veteran broadcaster and Nigerian talk-show host, Funmi Iyanda, has shed some light into a personal experience she had with her cook’s 4-year-old who threw a lot of temper tantrums. Funmi who is a single mum to a teen daughter recounted in a Twitter thread her experience with Opeyemi, her Cook’s daughter and how she has now come to the understanding that 4-year-olds are not mad.

In taking direct and practical approaches, the journalist revealed how she was able to guide the cranky toddler to more wholesome ways of channeling her energy and frustrations.

READ ALSO: 7 Ways To Deal With Your Toddler’s Tantrums

Read a part of her insightful experience below:

My cook’s 4 year old is spoilt as her mother had her late. We all spoil her cos she was born with a resting bitch face so she scares us.

She follows her mum everywhere so l insist she leave her with me. She starts gloriously wailing as per usual. So l ask her if she hates me 

This stops her mid wail as she looks at me in confusion. I asked again, do you hate me Opeyemi?

She said no, I lost everyone she loves in the house and ask same question. She shakes her head vigorously So why are you weeping to be left with us l ask. She has no answer ..

You know your mama is coming back right? I ask. She nods. Then l tell her crying makes us feel bad cos we love her and if she’s afraid her mama won’t come back she can tell me and we’ll FaceTime her.

We fist-bumped on a biscuit deal and that was that. 4 year olds are not fully mad.

This morning Opeyemi threw a tantrum, she kept hitting her mum. I noticed she did same yesterday. After the storm l asked her to sit at breakfast with me.

I asked her why she cries and hits her mum. She’s quiet.

I ask her what she’d like to do today, she’s quiet.

READ ALSO: “Why a woman’s worth is closely tied to motherhood” –  Funmi Iyanda Shares Inspiring Note

Identifying what some of the challenges were with opeyemi, the ace broadcaster said the toddler was not used to having conversations with adults and how prolonged togetherness with her mum and other adults without breaks for her to be a child or even be with other children was heightening her temper tantrums.

She then quoted Ghalil Gibran’s “Let there be gaps in your togetherness”, at the same time making adjustments to her  cook’s work schedule so Opeyemi can have more time with her family and friends.

Continue to read her narration below:

I realise she not used to having conversations with adults. So l we talked about the hymns she’s always singing.

I asked about her friends and learn she has 4; Blessing, Aduke, Ibrahim and Lukuluku, aged 4 to 7. Blessing is her best friend, they never fight She tells me.

I ask her if she misses them seeing she’s in a new neighborhood with no kids. She nods vigorously. I call her mum and ask if she converses with Ope.

Aunty l talk to her she says. I asked if she talks WITH her not to her or at her. Mother says she’s just stubborn..

She gives the scenario of this morning’s mother daughter battle. I pointed out that she’d lied to her and the child had hit her in frustration cos she’d learnt from her mother and others that you need to hit people to get your way.

I can see she thinks l’m talking shit….So l ask Ope if she’d prefer an arrangement where she can see her friends more often? She says yes.

I asked if she’d promise not to hit her mum again but tell her when she’s frustrated or unhappy about something. She nods. We fit-bumped to another deal and she skips away.

I talk with her mum and we change working arrangements to allow more time with family n friends so she’s not always with just her mum causing frustration of both parties.

Whether it is romantic or filial love Ghalil Gibran is right to say “let there be gaps in your togetherness”

Also 4 year olds are not completely mad.

READ ALSO: Why Your Child Has Temper Tantrums | 7 Tips To Handle It

She rounded off the thread saying:

Opeyemi is away for two weeks. I miss her.

No half smirk, half snark, half leg bend, head bobbing good mornings.

No shortie at the door eye balling anyone who dares come home with me.

No shrill cartoons competing for sofa space. I might need ginger biscuits to survive this.

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