Stedman Graham Reveals The Number One Secret To His 33 Years Lasting Relationship With Partner, Oprah Winfrey

American educator, author, businessman, speaker, and podcaster popularly known as the partner of media mogul Oprah Winfrey is opening up about his long lasting relationship with the entertainment mogul.

During a stop by at “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” on Friday to promote his new book “Identity Leadership,” Stedman Graham was asked if it was difficult being in a 33-year-long relationship with the queen of all media.

According to Graham, 68, one of the secrets to his relationship with Oprah, 65 is that he is ‘dedicated’ to the TV mogul’s happiness. Graham said:

“The thing about our relationship is I want the best for her. So I’m dedicated to her happiness, so that’s great for her and I want her to be the best she can possibly be and she’s done a pretty good job of doing it.”

Stedman and Oprah first bet at a charity event in 1986 — the same year the Oprah Winfrey Show debuted. He explained that in order to maintain a successful relationship — particularly when one partner is a super-famous media mogul — the two people involved must find their own personal happiness, before they can be happy together.

”So, for me, I’ve been able to find my own happiness, and to find my own skills, my own talents, my own abilities, and I’m satisfied with that. I’m happy with that.

And so the combination — when you have a good partner who is able to self-actualize their potential and you’re able to self-actualize yours, you know, one and one equals about six.”

SEE ALSO: Oprah Winfrey Reveals Why She Never Married Long-Term Partner, Stedman Graham

Ellen also asked Stedman his thoughts on Oprah running for president — something many fans began calling for after she delivered a rousing speech at the Golden Globe Awards last year. Although Oprah has since shut down the notion that she was interested in running for president, Graham was quick to offer his approval that she would make a great leader. He told DeGeneres:

”Oh yes. You can trust her, number one. She’s smart. She has a photographic memory. She works very, very hard. So she has the qualifications to do it. And she’s very successful.”

This isn’t the first time Stedman has opened up about his endless support for his partner of more than 3 decades. Back in 2015, Stedman said he isn’t threatened by Oprah’s incredible successes in life, when he appeared in a segment that aired on The Own network. He said:

‘We want each other to succeed. I want her to succeed and be as successful as she possibly can, so I encourage that. That’s not always an easy thing to do when you’re a man in a relationship with a very powerful woman, and so, I’m not threatened by her fame or her success or her money or all of that — that’s who she is. It has nothing to do with how I define myself.”

SEE ALSO: Oprah Winfrey Gets Real on Why She Never Wanted to Have Her Own Biological Children

Despite being together for 33 years, the couple decided not to marry. Speaking to Vogue in 2017, Oprah said she doesn’t think her relationship with the author would be the same if they had tied the knot.

Oprah said the marriage wasn’t even an option for the couple, having being engaged in 1992 and ultimately deciding to call it off. She stated:

”Nobody believes it, but it’s true. The only time I brought it up was when I said to Stedman, “What would have happened if we had actually gotten married?”

And the answer is: “We wouldn’t be together.” We would not have stayed together, because marriage requires a different way of being in this world.

His interpretation of what it means to be a husband and what it would mean for me to be a wife would have been pretty traditional, and I would not have been able to fit into that.”

She also reiterated her feelings about marriage in 2013, saying she made the decision by choosing to not get married. According to, she told Access Hollywood:

SEE ALSO: Devout Husband And Dad-Of-2, Jason Wilson Shares Secrets Of His 20-Years Blissful Marriage And It Is Heart-Warming

”If you ever interviewed him, he would tell you that had we married, we would not be together today. Because he’s a traditional man and this is a very untraditional relationship.”

The talk-show host also said she didn’t want the title of a ‘wife’. She explained:

”I think it’s acceptable as a relationship, but if I had the title “wife,” I think there would be other expectations for what a wife is and what a wife does. First of all, you’ve got to come home sometimes.”

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