A Nigerian wife, Michelle Lima, took to Twitter to give an eye-opening account of how she has evolved from an entitled toxic person to a more balanced wife and adult.
Lima says her bad behaviour was fuelled by her pretty appearance and she expected to be worshipped as a result. She explains how all of that has affected her marriage and how repositioning her mindset has brought about her enjoying her marriage after she had found it difficult due to her toxic traits.
Michelle believes there are other women living her old experience and she made a Twitter thread to help them confront their own demons, saying when she learned to compromise and listen.
The entrepreneur ended her narration advising that she believes people can get the best from their relationships by focusing on themselves rather than their expectations. She says,
“Love yourself first. Love yourself enough to want to become better for you and your partner. It starts with you. And it won’t happen over night. It takes time but you must want to.”
Read Lima’s full story below:
I started enjoying my marriage when I admitted that I had toxic traits that needed to be worked on and stopped making excuses. I set up my mind to making it work and Husband reciprocated the same energy. It’s never been the same since then.
One day I will tell you guys how I got into marriage thinking that man’s has to worship me because am pretty. I had huge pretty girl problems . Threw tantrums when I didn’t get my way. Never wanted to compromise, never listened. I took the whole “I’m the prize” thing too far…
I never put in any work in the marriage. I wanted everything handed to me cos am cute. Thank God that he’s blessed me with a patient man who through it all had my best interest in heart and fought for us when I was Wilding out. He’s my Angel and I am greatful for him.
I had been in relationships where I was worshiped so much that I started idolizing myself. If a man didn’t idolize me, I would leave. Never allowed people to be human around me. Yhu guys I come from far . I’m grateful that I’ve been delivered from that. Idolatry as it’s best.
And Alot of young women suffer from this. Especially the ones who’ve always been pretty and praised by everyone. That gets to your head and at some point you start thinking that’s the best you got.
Admitting this was very painful cause I thought everyone was the problem. It was hard and depressed me. I couldn’t believe it. I thought I was EVERYTHING & PERFECT & any man would be lucky to have me breath next to him. But I had to do more than that.
I believe that you will get the best out of any relationship if you can just focus on yourself. Love yourself first. Love yourself enough to want to become better for you and your partner. It starts with you. And it won’t happen over night. It takes time but you must want to.
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