Access Bank Group Head, Amaechi Okobi Recalls How It Went The First Time He Had A Conversation About Adultery and Gender Inequality With His Son

Father-of-two and the Group Head, Communications and External Affairs at Access Bank, Amaechi Okobi took to his Instagram to speak on gender bias as it affects men and women, but particularly women. While addressing the subject in his post, he recalled the conversation he had with his son a few years back.

While sitting over lunch, the banker said his son, who was eight years old at the time asked him a rather awkward question. According to his narration, his son had asked him if one individual can commit adultery all by themselves; of course he replied ”no”, then his son  goes on to ask him why only the woman is stoned in the Bible for committing adultery.

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That narrative exposed in their conversation is an early pointer of the many inequality issues plaguing women, the banker shared. He rounded off his post by encouraging active participation of men in solving gender inequality issues.

Read his full post:

”Some years ago, my 8-year old and I were having brunch. No, he’s not 8 anymore; he’s a wee bit older now. Listen, though.

As we dined on our mushroom, cheese, tomato and chopped prawns omelettes (no pepper, of course), he suddenly got serious and asked: Daddy, can one person alone commit adultery? (Yikes! Please God, not this conversation) Trying hard to sound unflustered, I answered, “No Son, it takes two.”

His follow up was quick and urgent: Why then in the Bible do they stone women for committing adultery?

Where are the men? Cue in our first convo on gender inequality. But that’s not the story. The beautiful Amazons of @iamsaharagroup invited me to speak at their recent IWD event. They wanted tips for bridging the gender equality gap (male view).

150+ empowered, intelligent. badass Nigerian women. What an incredible, albeit terrifying honor? What do I know about women? And gender equality? Especially as I am the problem.

Men have benefitted from gender inequality for eons. But have we really? Benefitted? Imagine a world where the needs, behaviors and aspirations of men and women are considered, and favored, and valued equally. Mind blowing, huh? Imagine the economy, for one.

Several studies have confirmed the positive impacts gender equality would have on GDP per capita. For certain, the world would be a much better place.

Here’s the thing, though (the first thing, I think): Gender (in)equality impacts everyone, and therefore concerns both women and men. Gender equality for far too long has been treated mainly as a “women’s issue” – as women have been a driving force behind the agenda. But as my son said, “where are the men?”

We must jump in and play a stronger role in killing this beast. And not just the men that have daughters or sisters or girlfriends or wives or mothers. All men.

That’s when we’ll start winning. This game is not about empowering women. Women are already powerful. This game is about dismantling institutions and cultural norms that diminish women’s power.

Shoutout to the Amazons; I thoroughly enjoyed our time together. And I loved the gift basket and the toilet bag that screamed, ‘YOU’RE THE MAN.’”

See his original post: 

View this post on Instagram

Some years ago, my 8-year old and I were having brunch. No, he’s not 8 anymore; he’s a wee bit older now. Listen, though. As we dined on our mushroom, cheese, tomato and chopped prawns omelettes (no pepper, of course), he suddenly got serious and asked: Daddy, can one person alone commit adultery? (Yikes! Please God, not this conversation) Trying hard to sound unflustered, I answered, “No Son, it takes two.” His follow up was quick and urgent: Why then in the Bible do they stone women for committing adultery? Where are the men? Cue in our first convo on gender inequality. But that’s not the story. The beautiful Amazons of @iamsaharagroup invited me to speak at their recent IWD event. They wanted tips for bridging the gender equality gap (male view). 150+ empowered, intelligent. badass Nigerian women. What an incredible, albeit terrifying honor? What do I know about women? And gender equality? Especially as I am the problem. Men have benefitted from gender inequality for eons. But have we really? Benefitted? Imagine a world where the needs, behaviors and aspirations of men and women are considered, and favored, and valued equally. Mind blowing, huh? Imagine the economy, for one. Several studies have confirmed the positive impacts gender equality would have on GDP per capita. For certain, the world would be a much better place. Here’s the thing, though (the first thing, I think): Gender (in)equality impacts everyone, and therefore concerns both women and men. Gender equality for far too long has been treated mainly as a “women’s issue” – as women have been a driving force behind the agenda. But as my son said, “where are the men?” We must jump in and play a stronger role in killing this beast. And not just the men that have daughters or sisters or girlfriends or wives or mothers. All men. That’s when we’ll start winning. This game is not about empowering women. Women are already powerful. This game is about dismantling institutions and cultural norms that diminish women’s power. Shoutout to the Amazons; I thoroughly enjoyed our time together. And I loved the gift basket and the toilet bag that screamed, ‘YOU'RE THE MAN.’ Ps. It’s Church and brunch Day. #iwd2020

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