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Dear MIMsters: I Told My Husband-to-be My Biggest Secret And His Reaction Shocked Me

Let me start my story from the beginning because I believe Mimsters can learn from it. I told my then fiance the biggest secret about my life and his reaction shocked me.

I was the only child between my mom and dad, I was born out of wedlock and my dad didn’t even know about my existence until I was about two years old.

Meanwhile, he had already impregnated another woman before impregnating my mum and he was forced to marry this other woman. So when he got to know about me, it was already too late and my mum said she had already lost interest in him and they had gone their separate ways.

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I got to meet my dad at the age of 11 and he didn’t want me to go back to live with my mum. They discussed and came to the conclusion that I should live with my dad. Meanwhile, my dad had a son, my older brother, we became very close, and gradually, by the time we got to the senior class, we started playing dirty.

Our dad knew we were close and even my mum who wasn’t living with us knew we were close but they didn’t know what was really going on between us. We were not having sex, but we were just playing with each other’s private parts.

We were done with secondary school and proceeded into the tertiary institution but in different states. I was the one who always visited him because he was working and schooling.

One day, while doing our abominable act, he released on me without penetrating, I guess it was the case of the fast swimmers as they say.

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I went back to my school and started feeling somehow. I took my self to a hospital near my house to ask for a pregnancy test. I was a novice. I was told to bring my early morning urine for a test and I did. That was how I found out that I was pregnant.

I called my brother to inform him and he told me to come over to his place. He took me to a hospital and we did the abortion. That incident put a stop to our stupid and abominable act.

I would have died from the abortion due to so many things (complications) that happened afterward but the mercy of God said no, and God kept me alive. Yet, nobody found out about all this.

Then fear set in. Will I have a child? Will anybody marry a girl like my self?

I went to God and asked for forgiveness, and I confessed to my pastor in school at the time, who prayed for me. I decided not to hid my sin from my future husband if God will be merciful enough to give me one.

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I later met a guy who was working, not quite long after the whole pregnancy/abortion scenario, I was in 200L then. We started out as friends and he never showed any interest in dating me. He was just a guy who always looked out for me and it didn’t even cross my mind that he would want to date me.

After being friends for months, like almost a year, he just said it out of the blues that he wants me to be his girlfriend. I laughed at him because he was handsome, working and godly, I didn’t believe someone like him was available but he was adamant and eventually, I accepted.

A month into the relationship, we were talking and I asked him if he would like to marry a virgin. He responded by saying if he ended up marrying a virgin fine, and if not so, be it. Right there and then, without pre-planning it or even thinking what his response was going to be, I narrated my episode with my brother to him.

He listened. Then he looked at me and called me by my name and said, “if you hadn’t told me all these, would I have known about it?”

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“No,” I said.

He said, “thank you for telling me. I will still love to have you as my better half.”

I couldn’t believe my ears because I am always afraid of the fact that no man will want to marry me after hearing this and I have vowed to myself not to keep secrets from my husband or husband to be. This is because I believe that the devil thrives when there are secrets between couples and I don’t want the devil to have any foothold in my family, if God will be so gracious as to give me one.

We dated for four years and to the glory of God, we are now married and I gave birth 9 months after my wedding. Right now, we are the ones telling God that we are ok with the number of children we have and taking every precaution we can to make sure I don’t become pregnant again.

I have a loving and caring husband, God gave me a man I can’t even imagine for myself. He helps me with house chores and takes care of the children. He is a man who is always ready to spend all his earnings on the children and me.

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I found grace and I am still enjoying that grace and mercy.

So as much as you can, do not keep anything away from the man you plan to spend the rest of your life with. Try not to give the devil a loophole into your home. Live a life of no secrets with your spouse.

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