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Dear MIM: My Hubby’s Ex and Mother of His Child Wants Him Back

Dear MIM: My Hubby’s Ex and Mother of His Child Wants Him Back

Mamas in the house please l need advice from you.
I live abroad but my husband visited Nigeria for Christmas. He had a child outside wedlock with a woman he dated for 11 years but he didn’t pay her pride price.
My husband broke up with this woman before he travelled abroad in 2002. In 2006, he came back, met and had sex with the same woman which led to pregnancy. She didn’t tell until she was four months gone. That same year, I met my husband and we had our traditional, court and church wedding but he didn’t tell me about this woman.
In 2009, the woman called and told me everything. When l asked him about her, he admitted and narrated how it all happened. He had accepted the pregnancy and she was living with his sister but she left when she couldn’t get along with his family.
He told me that he went looking for her but was told she had remarried but her marriage didn’t last.  She was angry to find out that they told my husband that she was married. The problem now is the woman told my husband that she gave up nine years of her life waiting for him and that her life is incomplete without him.
My question is how should I handle this?
View Comments (26)
  • Please this issue has got nothing to do with you personally. Don’t interfere. Let your hubby handle it and make sure he sort things out seriously with her before She start causing friction in your home.

    • It has everything to do with her! It’s her home. Her husband her life. Which one islet him sort it out hmselg

  • Honestly if am a woman I’ll say you shouldn’t let go & fight for your man like you said he got married to you both trad & white,if God wanted that union your husband would have met her b4 you

  • Your husband needs to address the issue, that the woman wants him back doesn’t mean he will pack and go stay with her. You guys doesn’t even reside in the same country. Your husband should cut off any means of communicating with her, he should be sending her money for the upkeep of the child through a bank account, then his family members that lives around keep an eye on the child.

  • What is there to handle? Your biz is not with the woman but your hubby. Your hubby needs to be open with you and plans he has regarding his child. Please he’s the one that has to tell the woman that life has to go on . Wonder why she dated a man for 11 God years. ..kai

  • Madam please pray and soak your marriage(esp husband)in the blood of Jesus Christ.Such desperation can make the woman go diabolical just to have your husband

  • Hmmmm, be careful ma and hold on to God. Your husband should sort it out. Just pray harder n hold on

  • Please pray, pray & pray everytime. Prayer is the solution to all problems. It is not ur burden, give it to God once its too much for u. There is nothing impossible for God & He will RESTORE ur marriage & happiness.

  • How do u handle dis??? Pls tread wit caution cos I can sense desperation in d other woman’s word pls dnt let them use u as a scapegoat pls be smart

  • She involved u by calling u. U are involved cos it’s your husband. Now the real question is this..what do your husband want to do about it? There’s a reason he didn’t marry her then,& he’s not gonna marry her now. Another question is this.. do u guys have kids together? Is there a male child there? What is the sex of his away child? These are things u ought to mention so peeps can be in a better position to advice u….not this don’t get involved bullshit….u are already involved sister!! I sense deeper things & issues here dear. Among all tha asas way full naija,y did ur hubby go back to this particular old cargo? SMH… deep it is.

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