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Dear Mimsters: Would I Be Wrong To Ask For A Separation From A Husband Like Mine?

Dear Mimsters: Would I Be Wrong To Ask For A Separation From A Husband Like Mine?

I have been married for 6 years now with 2 kids but I want a separation from my husband. I have a very good job, to God be the glory.

I married my husband when he had zero account balance. To start with, he deceived me and lied to me about himself. After wedding, the reality set in. No house, no job, no business. We were living off families and friends. Got later blessed me with a job and I pay 90% to 100% of our expenses without complain. Praying for his breakthrough. His cheating nature is Federal! He cheats with small small girls that you will never imagine in life. Very lazy, very arrogant, full of pride and lies about everything. Is it the emotional trauma? Calling me a witch, that I dont want him to make money so that I will be the bread winner (which woman wouldn’t want her husband to prosper, who likes suffering)? Is it the physical abuse? Many times, I would want to walk out of the marriage, families and pastors will remind me that I am a prominent figure in the church, so should give another chance and see what God can do.

I have never enjoyed marriage. He is so irresponsible to the point that he doesnt care if the kids and I feed or wear new clothes. Now that God has started blessing him, his money goes to women outside and their mothers. My own mum who used to send money and foodstuffs to us when we lacked is now his arch enemy. If I catch him cheating, he will turn it around and make me look as if something is wrong with me.
I am so depressed now, frustrated and contemplating suicide. He has said he would kill me if I leave him.

I can comfortably rent an apartment and take care of my kids. His brother said I have no right to report my husband that if his own wife tries it, he will send her to her father’s house.

My family has asked me to move out before he kills me but my pastor said we should continue praying while his family said I should endure, that that’s marriage for me. At this young age! I have suffered more than one in a 20 year-old marriage.

Please, Christian mothers is separation a sin? I need practical advices not prayers. I am a prayer warrior myself and have prayed for 6 years!

View Comments (6)
  • Separation and divorce is no sin madam. Even God permitted divorce on the grounds of adultery so I don’t know what you are talking about. If he eventually kills you, I hope that pastor asking you to stay will help care for your kids. Better leave that man and move on with your life please.

  • stay there. when he kills you we will come and bury you. , when you die ,you will go alone. your pastor will still be here confusing others. you are a prayer warrior then listen to the voice of God and not that of your pastor. the gift of God addeth no sorrow. he belongs to a set of men that has no regard for anybody. i wont tell you to leave. stay if you like, the life is yours. this is twelve years my husband left me. he has not repented. the prayers i prayed for him will convert a whole village. i believe in God touching those that want to be touched.

  • God do not hate the divorcee , its divorce that God hate, if a marriage bcoms a thing of enduarance then its no longer marriage, those that are advising u to stay will not say otherwise cos when tomorrow comes and things started getting better btw u and ur husband u will pick them as enemy .my dear na u wear the shoe if u can endure the pain keep on but if u cant fling it away. Its ur life and u can only live it once.

  • Separation is not a sin. The bible recommends that if you separate you should remain unmarried or you go and reconcile ( 1Cor10:11). That is what you need right now because there is violence. 6yrs of emotional torture is no joke and you need a sound mind to raise your children. Take time off to cool off while praying for him.

  • Separation isn’t a sin atall. I ve 2 friends who are ministers of d gospel and are separated. U wld end up dead one day if u continue. Adultery is a ground for divorce self. First of all, go complain formally in the police station, make sure u record conversations either via phone or when he is verbally or physically abusing u, press record on ur phone, that wld stand as evidence.they wld arest him and Ke him sign surety not to harm u and if as much as phone theft or anything happens he wld b held responsible. Him and his family, trust me, they wld protect u. Walk away, intact run. He doesn’t want u to leave cos u his maga dat is sustaining him. I have a friend who married such a man. She ran 4 her dear life. Everything abt d guy was a lie even to his genotype and blood group

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