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Dear MIMsters: Is My Friend Hitting On My Husband Or I Am Imagining Things?

Dear MIMsters: Is My Friend Hitting On My Husband Or I Am Imagining Things?

I think a mutual friend of ours is hitting on my husband or am I imagining things?

I see the way she looks into my husband’s eyes when she is talking to him. She always takes his side whenever my husband and I have our small arguments. Her husband treats her like crap, talks to her disrespectfully and calls her names.

I actually feel sorry for her because she has a nice personality. My husband is cut from a different clothe. Not only does he spoil me silly, he accords me a great deal of respect. She gushes about my own husband telling me that I am lucky.

This friend of ours always seek to hang out with us. If my husband won’t be available, she would like to postpone a date until he is available. She greets my husband with hugs and kisses on his cheeks. I don’t greet her husband that way. When we are walking, she’ll leave to go walk with my husband, while I walk with the kids.

I asked my husband if he’s noticed how sweet she always is to him and he said a little. One day we all went to the mall with the kids but her hubby didn’t come along. As usual, she took her steps next to my husband while her kids, mine and I were in front.

We had walked on for a bit towards the car park, when turned around I saw her holding my husband’s hands. When she saw me, she quickly pulled her hand away. I wasn’t sure how to react, so I stayed calm.

I asked my husband afterwards what was going on. He said he was also surprised when she took his hands but did not want to embarrass her. I trust my husband because he allows me access to everything including his phones. We don’t have secrets between us. He admits she likes him.

Please tell me, what should I do about this?

 

View Comments (24)
  • Address the issue with her simple. Tell her you do not like the unnecessary familiarity she’s having with your hubby and she should please watch it before you snap @ her. And please minimize outings with her or any avenue she would have to be close to your hubby.

  • Well…..itz so clear you are not imagining tinz bcs she is also watching you….friends like that can be dangerous…..she can go to any length to get your hubby to herself…..itz a wicked world we live in, I will strongly advice you have a deep talk with your hubby & likewise he shouldn’t be available to be wherever she is……moreso plz keep her @ arms length……there is more to her…..may the Almighty give you wisdom

  • She’s hitting on ur husband and is as d result of negligence frm her own hubby pls cut down d Quality of time ur family spends wit hers and pls no communication gap btw u and ur hubby cos is necessary to be a step ahead of her

  • Message.. She s hitting on ur man n u berra talk it out wt her n avoid such frnd b4 she finally destroy ur home

  • Stop her before she start seducing him. I had a friend like that who was very close to hubby to the extent she call him baby just as I do. When hubby travelled out the slut started sending pics to hubby and he showed me all the pics she sent not for once did she tell me she was sending my hubby pics; even at a time when I sense something was not right I ask her to stop chatting with hubby she started giving me attitude and when I confronted her about the picture she said hubby ask her to send it. So I told her that means if hubby had ask for sex she would agree and do it.

  • Ur hubby should start giving her space if he doesn’t really like her advances.

    suspend any outing that will involve her for now. One can’t trust anyone on issues like this not even ur hubby.
    B wise dear.

  • Madam pls u dnt have 2 be nice at ur own expense.Friendship is not compulsory.Whether u are imagining things or not,l will advice u trust ur instincts.Unless she is feeding u n ur family,severe such friendship b4 its too late.Men are very vulnerable 2 such moves.

    • I totally agree with u. We men go with the flow. We find it difficult to say no to women making advances at us esp if she’s pretty and curvy. Men can fall into such traps easily cos most of us lack self control. Don’t blame us that’s how we were created. U know the right thing so do it cos ur man is powerless esp if it were through u he met her. He won’t want to embarrass her even when her hands are in his pants.

  • my dear.cut off from her Ooo.bfr she snatches ur man…..give her a busy signal anytime she wants to visit or come close.hitting on ur man does show a nice personality at all

  • That is how it starts. Soon she will start coming when your hubby is alone. Please, address it now, even if it means losing her friendship. As they say Prevention is better than Cure

  • How van u ask this silly question. Confront her sharp sharp. End the friendship and save your marriage. Disgrace her if need be. Abi u nor love your husband?

  • Here is the truth you can’t trust a man. Even a man with principles can fall. In this case your husband should have warned her if he is not comfortable with what she is doing. I guess the reason why he has not scolded is because he is enjoying every bit of it. Don’t be surprised that they have started hanging out without you knowing it. For her to hold ur husband’s and he didn’t release it means something is going on. I don’t know if they have slept with each other but something definitely going on. Lady you have to severe your friendship with ur friend because she will ruin your home. She will start visiting your husband @ the office so you need to have a heart to heart talk with your husband. He also has a role to play. He needs to warn her and tell her to stay away from his home except there’s something going on between them. Also put it in prayers. May God help you

  • I don’t know why most ladies cause problems for themselves and when it’s outta control they start looking for solutions. When u noticed she hangs out with you only when ur hubby is around, u didn’t sense anything. Now she’s holding hands with him while you’re the nanny for yours and her kids. I pity you. Sit there and continue to ask questions madam. Until she starts sleeping on your matrimonial bed and send you to the guest room before you wake up. What do you need such friends for for Christ sake. You better warn her to stop coming to your house or even near your husband. You think your hubby will tell you he’s started sleeping with her. Mtcheww

  • Dear poster, you are not imagining things but things are unfolding themselves and will soon turn to reality. Keep your friend away from your family, don’t allow her visit u again and don’t allow her hang out with you and hubby. Tell her you won’t be around anytime she wants to visit u. Just bear in mind that she isn’t a good friend

  • Dat is how it start,u hav to talk to ur hubby,nd cut down d quality time u guys use to hav together,na play them 4 dey enter dance oo.if after talking wit her nd she stil continue on those things u said,than u hav to emberras her wit style,not fighting.pls b wise nd also ask frm God

  • im being forced to comment on this because i have had such an experience. And i just had to confront my friend and tell her point blank to stay off, mine was seperated from her husband. If a friend causes you pain, then i dont think there is any point to keep holding on to her. In my case, I Almost lost my home, hubby like any other man who is enjoying extra attention outside would never say anything. All he did when I have to go out my friend was to warn me” Be Careful with her”.I never understood what he meant. They both put up appearances when i am with them.
    When i finally got a hang of what was happening, i raised hell for the two of them, alerted our other friends, parents and relatives who all knew us to be friends, they never knew what hit them, Today to the glory of God, my home is back together with the Peace of Jesus in it.
    My sister stay away from her, a friend that does not respect boundaries. Tell your husband to stay away from her, Pray to God to keep ur home from enemies both within and without.

  • Don’t sit and be trusting your husband cos you can’t possibly be dangling fresh meat in front of a dog and expect it to stay calm because you fell it’s a trained dog. Ask your friend to stay off your hubby and make sure your hubby is present when the issue is being discussed. What rubbish!!!

  • You need to cut off from her ASAP as it seems this your friend wants to switch homes. I have seen it happen before to a woman and her former secondary school classmate.
    You have to start acting very cold to her. Don’t involve her in any of your family activities and if she wants to tag along, just politely tell her it’s a family outing. Don’t call her and if she calls just be cold.
    Cut off your friendship with her immediately

  • You kip noticing that she stays beside ur husband during outtings, nd u still let that slide? Y nt hold ur husband’s hand wen u go out? He shud hold d kids wv one of his hands and u grab another,so no space for her to hold ur hubby. Which kind frdship z dt?nd u open ur eyes wide dey look?? Stop inviting her to ur family gathering or outtings, stop gisting her abt what goes on in ur house. Start giving her attitude,chase her veeerrryyy far away from u. Tel Her u wud report al her advances to her husband,…and u av to talk to ur husband,y is he condoning the advances? He shud let ur frd knw he is married to u. This ur frd go collect ur husband if u no dy careful oooo.my sister,shine ur eyes,wise up, defend ur home,fight for what is rightly urz.

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