What Newlyweds Should Know About Negative Influences And How They Can Set Boundaries
The early years of marriage can be somewhat fragile, navigating it with wisdom will go a long way in building the right foundation. Because marriage is sacred, it must be guarded and nurtured, newlyweds must discuss and confront issues or persons that may put a strain on the love, trust and faith that bind their union. But to do that, they must recognise the signs and know how to remain undivided.
READ ALSO:Nigerian Couple, Reverend & Mrs Nnagbe Itam Welcomes First Child After 22-Years Of Marriage
What Are The Usual Negative Influences To Watch Out For?
In principle, marriage is to be honoured by all and sundry, not just the married couple. Before negative interference threaten the peace of your marriage; you and your partner need to know what those negative influences are like, and set boundaries against them from the get-go.
Negative influences usually come in the form of:
- parents who are too involved
- siblings in the relationship
- friends who hang around too much and feel very entitled towards your marriage
- former boyfriends or girlfriends who are still in a couple’s social circle
How To Go About Setting Boundaries
1. Set Kind Boundaries
Some people hang around too much and are just not aware their presence might be an intrusion – the mum who drops by unannounced ready to stay two weeks in your home or the old friend who always wants to come over.
Subtly but firmly let your loved ones know that you make each other and your marriage a priority, encourage them to notify you ahead of visits.
Some people may be offended by it but will adjust over time, while some other people will understand and respect that parameter.
2. Guard Against Toxic People
Some relationships should not be nurtured. For the good of your marriage, you must protect it against chronically intrusive and judgmental relatives, friends and overly entitled persons.
3. Make Healthy Connections
Connect regularly with people who have same views on the sacredness of marriage with you- and who are not your family members.
That may be a young couple as you or an older couple who is willing to mentor you. Connecting with good people will help you deal with the ones who aren’t so healthy.
4. Remain Undivided
Make conscious efforts to protect your marriage through communication, confront negative influences as a team and reassure each other of your marriage and commitment to it.