Dear MIM: How Can I Settle Down With A Married Man Without Hurting Anyone?
I am a 29-year-old single lady. I met and helped this married man in my own little way. God blessed what I did for him and he’s pretty much OK now.
Since then, he has been there for me, meeting my needs even when I don’t need anything from him. He keeps telling me that I deserve it and that if I had refused helping him, maybe he would be on the streets today.
The problem is that he is married with kids and even though he has never asked me out at any time, he always makes sure that I’m fine at all cost. He is always around me and I am beginning to have some feelings for him. How do I go ahead with him without hurting anyone as I need to settle down?
STOP DECIEVING yourselve leave the MARRIED MAN alone o! How can you even be asking this question? Of course you are ruining his marriage and your decision to settle down with him will hurt his wife and kids. Why are you in a hurry? Wait for your own jare.
STOP EYEING ANOTHER WOMAN’S THING.
Pls try to stay away from him tell him he’s closeness is making u uncomfortable a married man is a no go area Pls stop falling in love with him
Go and beg thy wife to be her Co wife, if she accept then u wont hurt anyone, but if she refuse, then back off stay away from thy man change ur line, and relocate, by that both u, thy wife and kids will all be happy
Man wey never even toast you. Issok oh.
You cannot have any form of emotional relationship with him without hurting lots of people.Just because you helped him and he is showing gratitude doesn’t give you the right to make a move on him.he is married with a family don’t tear them apart please . He sounds like a good man.
Well, he is taken this gratitude thing too far. You helped him and thats a good thing. Dont accept the gratuitude to the extent that you end up destroying his marriage. Dont be in a hurry.Wait for your husband. This is not your husband.
biko is dere no man again on planet earth u can marry.my somes customized property.if u d one in d woman’s shoes how would feel.dont frget wat goes aroind comes around.i beg go n look for ur own husband. hes not evn showing intrest in u,u want to seduce him???dat would b cheap of u.u just 29stop being desperate. u would find ur own man.
I will just ask you a simple question,how will you feel if another strange woman settles down with your husband in future…If you will feel great then go ahead!
Stop seeing his compliment and kind gesture as a special thing rather see it as coming from an older brother because the truth is you can never date a married man and not hurt the wife or kids. So for you not to turn the blessing of God into curse you have to kill that feeling ASAP.
So becos u did one tiny favor for him u want to marry him. Na u start to dey do favour abi for married man! I beg just live that man alone and look for ur own, and stop asking stupid questions
Let me not say wetin dey my mind.Please get your own man.He belongs to another woman
Jamb question
Dnt allow d wroth of God to face u
Sorry for urself u just want to destroy ur future
Stop building castles in the air, wake up from your day dream and tell yourself the truth, u are already hurting someone. Time the man is suppose to spend with his wife and family he spends with youyou, money he is suppose to us them, he uses to solve your problems,very soon he will start spending weekends with you. Stop while you still can don’t be a home wrecker.
This ur question ehn!so annoying.how can u say u don’t want to hurt anybody yet you are eyeing someone’s husband?the man is showing appreciation.pls leave that family alone.
Woman u get mind o. Better listen to what people are telling u
What kind of question is this
may God hav mercy on u, dis is a strong family problem u need prayer.
Lol, fake story. Go sleep jor, u de find wetin to paste, mitcheww. Shameless
He has never Asked u out but u HV fallen for him n even thinking of settling down with him,pls don’t deceived urself, get a boyfriend n b positive,NCOs u helped him does not mean he must marry u, even if he is single. it is God who rewards.
What a question, another desperado on the loose, Olosho
Pls don’t settle down with him. You will not only hurt a lot of people, you will also hurt yourself. If you eventually marry him, d love you think he has for you might turn into dislike later and you’ll end up having regrets for d rest of your life. You are a lady with a good heart so don’t worry, your own husband will come with God on your side. Reduce your closeness with him and get very busy so you don’t have time to think about him. Go out with friends or watch movies. Discourage d man from coming around you all d time. Tell him to spend more time with his family. By now I’m sure his wife and kids would have notice dey don’t see him as often as before again. Pls stay away from him before you wreck another woman’s home
U want to have some else hubby and u are asking if you wnt hurt anyone. Nonsense
Stop living in self deceit, you know you’ll be ruining that man’s family if you continue with this, so back out now. Pray to God to give you your own man and stop the “long-throat” over someone else’s, otherwise karma awaits you.
Imagine o; this man is helping u on a neutral ground& you want to probably seduce him bc he’s being nice and appreciative of the little help you rendered? U see this life, maybe the man should have been an ingrate at least he would have avoided your preying eyes . hope he sees u for who you truly are& run away from you fast so he does not break his home
Is there a way u can date some else’s husband n nt hurt d person n d family? Sorry ur question is dumb, it’s beta u go away from d man n get a beta life 4 urslf, u r still young 2 get urslf ur man, a single man nt anoda woman’s husband
Lady, please be sincere with yourself. There is no way you can go for a married man without hurting anyone. Please don’t do it. For even thinking about not hurting anyone, i know you have a conscience. Please let it guide you. Stay away from this man and let him face his family. God will reward you for the good you have done for him.
See ? Settle down with who na, you know u will hurt someone, u know d truth which is bitter. I so much like d man, never want to tanish his image/marriage, his best is to assist u, he never failed in doing that. gegele move on, stay focus, ur dream man will come. If u spoil somebody home, no peace 4 U. A word is enough 4 d wise!!!
You are looking for what it is not looking for you and after you angle girls will say it’s the men that comes after you. Instead of you to look.for someone else it’s a married man that u r after and soon he will use you and dump you and u will come to ask another question
This is bull shit, go and get busy. Leave another woman ‘s husband. You sound really desperate! Desperation kills. A word is enough for the wise.
I don’t see anything wrong with a man marrying more than one wife, I can’t imagine anyone being hurt
i know people like U, HOLY GHOST FIRE!!!!
Insanity dot org. You need to settle down and a married man with kids is your best bet, it’s a pity some ladies don’t know their worth.
Dear poster, by know you should have learn something from all the comment, leave another woman husband
How can u settle with a married man abi how can u avoid a married man? abegi, go and look for ur own hubby or u wait or ask God for ur own man
If u have anything to do with him,d thunder wey go fire u still dey do press up
My advice for you is to let the man alone for goodness sake he is a married man and you are a single lady and likewise there are young minds like you hoping to get married to you one day.Stop this or else it will end up wounding you.
my dear u are still young,u helped him good,nothing is wrong helping someone,he in turn is helping u 2,he has not said anything,yet u’ve started falling 4 him,hmmmm o girl u go fall break neck,pls in d name of God dont have anything 2 do with him,dont scatter another woman’s,or better still call him nd ask him of his intention.but please say no 2 sorrow nd shame.d woman fit pour u acid oooo
My dear,you know the answer to that question.Do the right thing and stop being desperate.
he wanted the man just because the man is rich assuming the man does’nt have anything he will never pray to get close to him and that was most ladies of nowadays were looking for, a ready made.
well dear,I’m in the same shoes as you. sometimes people tend to judge without first hearing from the other party involved.
In my own case,the married man wants out of the loveless and emotional battering that his wife gives him.
so would the public still judge me as going after someone else property?
abeg free her jare
u better go find ur own 419. Better men are outside their
The only way you can settle down with him without hurting anyone is to LEAVE HIM. Then nobody will be hurt except you. This man belongs to someone else your own man is waiting for him, go and find him. Good luck!