“How I fell into the trap of dating a married man,” A Single Lady Recounts
A man asked me to date him a year ago and I agreed without knowing he was married. He’s in his 30s, so, I had asked him if he’s married and he told me a big ‘no’. He never wore a ring and he stays alone in Uyo where he works. Meanwhile, he kept his wife and son in Lagos. I even knew his house and it was exactly a bachelor’s house with nothing to suggest he had a wife.
Few months passed, and he kept travelling to Lagos to see his ‘parents’. He told me he was so lucky to have me in his life and that God will bless and keep our relationship. He kept sending money and gifts to me. He would spend just few days in Lagos and rush back to Uyo to be with me. Honestly, I was there picturing us together as a married couple in a few years.
I trusted him and soon told my siblings about him, telling them that he seemed serious with me. I come from a Christian family and I’d never tell my siblings if I was intentionally dating a married man. He really fooled me.
Then, one day, I felt so troubled when he started saying all those love stuffs and I don’t even know what made me ask, “Are you sure you are not married because you really don’t pick calls when in Lagos.” He swore he was not married and started begging me to stop hurting him with such questions. I agreed and few days later, I had a break from school and he wanted to be with me. Normally, I don’t snoop, but I remembered my suspicions about him and checked his phone.
Things looked okay till I saw very old pictures of him with a baby and a lady. I was shocked! I sent them to my phone and asked him few days later if he has a kid and he said no. I then sent the telltale pictures to him and he rushed over and started crying that he couldn’t afford to lose me.
He said he could explain, and that he was not happy with his wife. He called the whole of the night and the next day, sending apology texts. He said it was an arranged marriage and that he’s in love with me and wanted us to be together. He said he never wanted to tell me about his marriage to avoid losing me and all that crap. This was someone that was always telling me to be faithful. I called him a liar and broke up with him.
I thank God for just one thing, that I had said no to premarital sex because it would have been too painful. He still tries to come around and sends friends to beg for him. I just wonder what he’s begging for because I know it can never work.
God bless u for dis
Hmmmm, the only thing i pick here was that you never open your legs for him…keep it up
Some men are irresponsible
U did well by quieting when u found out dt he is married let him go bk to his wife
Ladies like you are hard to come by. God will give you a man after His own heart. May God bless you
Glad you did not open your legs for him. No matter how nice or good a man is NEVER have sex with him if you are not his wife. I thank God for delivering you from such a mess. If he’s no longer interested in the marriage he should divorce.
This same thing happened to me exactly 3years ago and I am yet to heal completely. Mine’s family was even here in Lagos and he was leaving some place else as a bachelor. Even when his wife called me to inform me and I asked him he still denied it saying she’s not his wife she only had a child for him meanwhile they had two kids. It was then I knew he was a wicked soul denying his wife and kids and even swearing you can imagine. Well I broke up with him immediately and till date he is still begging me. Rubbish.
For married women whose spouses live and work in another state,try and carve out time from your busy schedule and know where your husband lives.Pay him surprise visits once in a while.If his wife had done these,chances are the man would not misbehave because madam fit show anytime or better still someone who has seen the wife would have warned this lady.That is how he would have deceived the lady,impregnate her and the wife will cry foul on finding out
Men men … you can never trust them
Human beings are terrible, you can imagine. This is very regular in Abuja.
Lol sound like some one I know in uyo here,not only one thy guy change babes anyhow and promise all marriage,while thy wife is in Lagos,but unfortunately I don’t want to involve myself
Most married men deny their wives and I don’t no why
Hahaha…. I’ve been a victim of this before.. The annoying thing is they keep begging, begging for what nau?.. that a single girl should stay and fight a legally married wife over one stupid liar of a man whose d**k is made of gold or what? Nonsense!!! Poster good you broke up with the guy jare!
It’s well with u, u did d right thing
Thank God for your life that you realised on time if not thats how he would have useless your body and run back home to his wife
Thank God for you lady. Let him go and sort himself with his family. Arranged marriage bawo? You can’t force a real man to marry and besides did his parents also force him to sleep with her? Don’t mind him jare. Unserious is his name
see where someone has a repentant heart, good you did that, as some girls dont have shame so some men. there is a young lady now that moved in with a married man,in my compound this man is married with two kids and this young girl knows about it but have decided to make another woman cry, the man rented a house for her before now, he pays her bill but the wife didnt know, now the man claimed he has a set back in his biz and asked the woman to go back to the village, my fellow mothers since that day this girl moved in with the man. the wife is a friend but dont know how to tell her cos she is this type that claims their hubby is the holiest .
God bless you…… If you are being honest
na today.mtcheeew.the good thing is the Holy spirit would always tell me these men are married if not i would have fallen for two now and with time i always get proofs dat they married.i believe in praying to reveal that person true nature before ever saying yes.saves you from a lot of trouble n falsehood.
This sounds like my story with my ex, thank God u are wise not to open your legs for him.
welldone
My dear, same thing happened to me, my own case I asked and he denied it, what happened was after several months of dating and no sex he tried to rape me, after much pleading I said fine, not begging you anymore do you want sex, hold on I pulled off my clothes at that point he could not go on with it, then I left and told him never to call me again, after several years (4years) he sent me a friend request on Fb, I accepted only to see a picture of him tagged to his wife and their children’s photo
Anyway men are dangerous
Nice ine
Hnmmm….tank God for Grace upon ur life.how can a married man bin in love with another woman so deceitfully that he will want to deny his family… God help us women
Even God in heaven knows that i will neva stay with such a man as his wife after finding out,not bkos he cheated on me but bkos he went as far as denying I and d kids that’s the height of it all,even if u want to cheat must u deny ur family?be proud of d woman u married and let the foolish ones that wants to go with u continue to incure generational curses on them and their family….thank God for ur life tho that u got out on time
Hmmmm! Good! Broken engagement is better than broken marriage. Kudos dear