15 Simple Ways to Nurture Your Marriage (Part 2)

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Chiomah Momah

To be a successful wife or husband, you must keep on educating yourself on how to make your marriage stronger and better. In view of this, previously, we shared 7 simple things every couple should do to nurture their marriage (read here). Find 8 additional things to do…

8. Go for long walks together

The benefits of taking a walk with your spouse are manifold. Not only will you be forced to spend time together, you will also get some fresh air and burn some calories. Also, the very act of walking together in the same direction is very calming and can make you feel like you’re on the same team. Try and make your walks a weekly affair, you could take your children along sometimes and make it a family bonding time.

9. Get separate bank accounts

While this may be controversial, it may, in fact, save your marriage. The truth is that while joint accounts are good, they do not work for every couple. Thus, in addition to your joint account, go ahead and open separate accounts. Try not to abuse the fact that you have your own account by using it as an opportunity to hide your income from your spouse or carrying out transactions you know your spouse will not approve of.

10. Have a fun holiday

There are three holidays every woman needs; a family vacation, one with the girls and most importantly, one with you and your significant other. It doesn’t have to be a holiday that will cost an arm and a leg, it could be something as simple as a few days at a nice hotel. What is most important is that you are away from distractions of your everyday life and are spending time with your dearest. Such a holiday does not require elaborate planning; just make sure you and your spouse have each other’s undivided attention.

11. No flirting allowed

While the virtual affairs are dangerous, it is even worse when we engage in real flirting with our colleagues and the like. What may start out as innocent flirting may lead into something more serious. Set clear boundaries for office relationships and make sure that nothing and no one comes between you and your spouse.

12. Don’t fight dirty

Yes, in every marriage there are bound to be ups and downs but let us watch our reactions. Don’t say words you will regret to your spouse and never insult each other’s parents. While getting angry is a normal reaction, it’s important you do not lose your head and say or do things that will have far reaching implications.

13. Please & thank you

Always remember to appreciate all the things your spouse does for you, even the things that you expect them to do. Never take it for granted that your husband paid rent or helped in the kitchen. Saying thank you, especially for those unexpected things, always go a long way in making your spouse feel love, affirmed and appreciated.

14. Acknowledge & recognize your differences

One of the biggest problems married couples have is that we expect our partner to think like we do. We forget that everyone has a different upbringing which leads to different expectations as to what family life should look like. If we can pull back from our own paradigms, we may find that our mate’s family did a few things right that, and if integrated into our own relationship, might even heal wounds from our past. It is not healthy for partners to unthinkingly insist on their own way of doing things. When a man and woman come together, the new unit will reflect some of the aspects of each of their pasts. It’s then up to the couple to discuss, compromise where necessary and create their own family ideals.

15. Learn to forgive

A marriage is a partnership, and partners must support each other and learn to forgive each other. No matter how much your loved one offends you, it’s important not to let the sun go down on your anger. One of the most important characteristics of a strong marriage is the ability to forgive. If we can acknowledge our differences with our spouse and allow ourselves to see them as they really are instead of how we have them imagined in our minds, we will find it much easier to forgive. Inaccurate perceptions lead to unrealistic expectations, which result in shame and resentment. If we see our mate as they are, however, we can be grateful for the unexpected blessings they bring to the relationship.