Dads’ Profile: Segun Samuel Opens Up On Life As A Busy Dad & More

Segun Samuel is a married IT Entrepreneur and dad to Rebecca, Mojola (Mo) and twins, Charles and Michael. He opens up on life as a busy dad and more.

Influence of background on philosophies as a dad

“I grew up in the deep, dirty, ‘ghetto’ area of Lagos Island. If a man is really a product of his environment, I am an exception to that rule; people’s lives over there are really messed up. I drove through the area with some friends and they didn’t believe that I grew up there. I owe it to God and my parents, especially my mother. She was very tough and worked very hard. In fact, she worked until she passed on and was very strict. I mean, even if we weren’t part of the guilty party, we would still be afraid of what she would do when she returned from work. My kids are growing up in far better environment but discipline is still enforced because that is the way I was brought up.”

Philosophies as a dad

“You win some, you lose some. You have to be prepared to compromise. I don’t want to make all the money in the world at the expense of my family so I take on just enough work that allows me provide for my family and remain relevant.”

Toughest decision ever

“Getting my wife to stop her Nine-to-Five.”

Quality time with kids

“Because I’m always busy, I cannot say I spend nearly enough time with them. If I were to score myself, I’ll say 25 percent. But when I am in town, I try to spare as much time as I can. We play, ride our bicycles and watch TV.”

Issues with values

“I think there’s no way to imprint the values we want when both parents work as professionals. At the earlier stage of my marriage, both my wife and I were very busy; money was coming in but I found out my children where exhibiting the values and character traits of the aunts and house helps that were taking care of them. Moreover, most of these house helps and nannies are doing what they do because they come from dysfunctional backgrounds so how can they imprint the right values?

I read a book by Steven Covey, First Things First, and he said you have to decide if you want to be a good and effective parent or a career person. There’s no other way. We decided that my wife had to stay at home with the kids. Now, she’s self employed and that allows her to be at home with the children at every other time.”

Children’s peculiarities

“Rebecca is the first and I think she’s starting to understand life; she might not agree with you on a particular issue but she’ll concede and say Ok. Mojola is the second and she is daddy’s girl. I observed that she is more committed; where the others will handle an assignment trivially, she will see it to the end and even ask for feedback: “Is it ok?”, “should I bring more?” Michael, one of the twins, is daring and inquisitive. He wants to find out how things work and why you want him to do this or that. Charles likes talking.”

Roles in children’s education

“Well, I work in Abuja and come home during weekends. I honestly don’t spend as much time as I ought to. I am usually out and that’s why we, had to decide that my wife stop her 9 to 5 and start something that allows her time to monitor their academic performance. They are still growing. I want to watch and guide them. I can’t readily say what Rebecca or Michael is going to be. As Christians, we want to set the right foundation and values so that they will be guided internally to be the best at whatever they do.”

Children and sports

“Well, I recently bought bicycles so we ride around; there is enough space for that. At times they want to go out of the compound but I don’t permit that except I am with them. The school they attend is not big enough for them to play soccer or some other sporting activity but they do encourage parents to pay for swimming lessons at a facility close to the school.”

Fondest memory

“Let me see. Well, in recent times, when I come back from Abuja, there’s a struggle to massage my back, you know. They want me to lie down and walk on my back. Sitting with them to watch their kind of TV programs which is usually cartoons is also satisfying considering that I don’t spend as much time with them as I ought to.”

Tips for other dads

“Hmm…If there was a camera recording this, this is what I’ll say: a man should be a leader in every way. You should be the one the entire household is looking up to. You should be a spiritual head and adviser. It’s very important. If I was going to interview a man for a position in my company, I will do it in a different way: I want to know how you make decisions at home. If you can’t run your home, how can you run my business?”

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