Dads’ Profile: AbdulHakeem Adesola Kelani On His Top Daddy Surprises & More

AbdulHakeem Adesola Kelani is a broadcaster, writer and PR Consultant. He’s married to Zainab, an HR Executive, and they have a son, Khalid.

The first-time dad opens up on his top daddy surprises and more.

Top Daddy Surprises and Challenges

“The first real surprise or challenge about being a dad is the heightened sense of responsibility. When you have a child, almost every decision you take must factor in how it could affect that child. From the kind of job you do to the number of hours you spend outside, to the type of people you relate with, an increased sense of responsibility sets in.

The second surprise for me was the degree of possessiveness towards my son. I’ve always been around kids and have lots of nephews and nieces but from the birth of my son, they all took a back bench. It gets so bad that I even get jealous sometimes when he spends too much time with his mum and doesn’t come check what dada is up to! I sometimes watch him sleep and marvel at the realization that he’s my son.

The third thing is how quickly they grow! It seems as if one minute you’re bringing them home from the hospital and the next they’re fighting you for the remote control! They almost seem to grow right before your very eyes and the challenge is knowing when to start being firm and letting them know they can’t get away with everything like turning on switches, pulling on wires and removing the batteries from the remote control and tasting them!

Another challenge is, knowing when to be there and when to allow them space in order to develop a sense of their own self. A lot of people make the mistake of imprinting too much on a child that the child is bereft of his/her own personality. One must learn to strike a balance; when to take charge and instruct and when to let the child find their own path.”

Weaknesses, Mistakes?

“I wouldn’t say there have been any major mistakes, though my mother says I’m at fault for my son not walking early because I was always picking him up instead of letting him explore. My only weakness I would say is that I can’t stand to see him cry. The sound of his cry cuts me to the bone and I immediately try to find out why he’s crying and provide a remedy forthwith.”

Memorable moments…

“Every moment with my son so far has been memorable but two stand out. The first is the day he called me daddy for the first time. I was on my way to work and he’d woken up unusually early and we’d played for a while and when I had to go, he burst into tears and screamed ‘daddy’ and I had to come back into the house, and suffice to say I was a bit late to work that day.

The second time was when he walked the full length of the sitting room; I’d been away for a couple of days and when I got back, he walked all across the length of the room with arms outstretched to meet me, that I never will forget.”

What you love most about him

“I love everything about my son; his smile, mischievous grin, the way he makes a fist with his thumb sticking out when you tell him ‘chop knuckle,’ his laugh, the way we have serious conversations and you feel what he’s saying even when the words are gibberish, his pretend cry with no tears when he wants something and is not getting it, his many conversations on the phone with God knows whom, the way he smiles when he wants to do something you’ve told him countless times not to do, the way he quickly hands over objects he knows he’s not supposed to handle, like my glasses…EVERYTHING!”

Cutest thing he’s ever said to you

“My son has made a habit of saying ‘thank you,’ and it tickles me every time.”