Dear MIMsters: My Hubby And My Sister Are At Loggerheads. How Do I Handle This?

I don’t know how to handle my sister and hubby who are at loggerheads over a relative of mine.

I’m a mother of two. I had a relative of mine who lived with us until I sent her back to her parents when  she became unbearable. She would steal and deny when asked and manifested other forms of misbehaviour that really got my hubby pissed.

She also lied against a neighbor of ours and hubby and I were going to call the police for our neighbor but later decided not to. So hubby doesn’t want to see her in his house after making him look stupid before our neighbours.

After I sent her back to her parents, my sister who is also married took her to live with them knowing fully well the reasons I sent her back (though it doesn’t bother me).

Sometime last month, my sister said she was coming to my house (we don’t live in the same state). Hubby asked me, “hope your sister is not coming with that girl to my house.” I said nothing but didn’t tell my sister not to come with the girl so it doesn’t look like I’m giving her conditions for coming to my house, after all they weren’t going to spend the night.

My sister finally came with the girl which made hubby very angry. I have talked to hubby to let by-gone be by-gone but she insists on not wanting to see the girl anywhere around his house or kids. Now, my sister is saying that hubby is indirectly asking her not to come to our house.

The main issue now is that we are taking our son to the church in two weeks time and we plan to invite a few people which includes my parents and siblings but my hubby said he was going to call my sister’s hubby and invite them and tell them not to come with that girl.

After a while, he said he wasn’t going to invite them as he doesn’t want trouble which I didn’t agree to. I told him we have to invite them and if he insists on them not coming with her, it’s his decision and that he has the right to decide who comes to his house. On the other hand, I don’t know how to convince my sister to come because if she doesn’t come, it simply means she’s placed that girl above me and it won’t be good at all especially with the kind of hubby I have who will someday use it against me – that my sister I always talk about how close we are and inseparable chose a relative over me.

I really don’t know how to handle this to avoid problems in my home. If you were in my shoes, what will you do?