Dear MIMsters: Should I Or Not Beg My Husband?
I’m 27-year-old mum. My husband is a 42-year-old man and we are blessed with one son.
This man has really abused me emotionally. He never commends anything I do. I’m a great cook but my husband will never give me compliment even when his friends are asking for some to take home with. One of our neighbors who loves my cooking just got married and his wife asked for my recipes because he never stops telling her about my cooking. But my own husband would rather criticize instead of complementing my skills.
Also, he doesn’t like going out with me, instead, he goes with a particular friend of his. Since we got married about 3 years ago, I can count only 3 events I have been to with him. The first-two was after many complaints, the last one was his cousin’s wedding last Christmas. Others, he went with this same friend (single guy).
In the village, after he came back, I approached him calmly, asking him why he prefers going out with the guy than me, his wife. He just sprang up from the chair and threatened to beat me for asking him such stupid question. The next day he took us to my mother’s and went with his father for checkup.
After he left, I didn’t call him for 4 days neither did he call. Instead, he called my mum to ask after his son. Even when I called him to let him know his son was running temperature, he didn’t pick but called my mother. Since we came back to our base, he has been ignoring me.
He called me stupid for mopping the floor of his room which he now locks at night. He will pass by me and give my little cousin money to give to me, instead of handing it directly to me. Am I still talking of sex, he hasn’t touched me for 2 months.
After cooking, he leaves the house to go and eat outside. Not that I’m perfect, I have my own faults but am very sure I don’t deserve this kind of treatment. I don’t know if it’s because he is way older than I am. I usually beg him whenever we quarrel both even when he’s at fault but this time I have decided not to give in. I just want to know if I did anything wrong by asking.
Don’t beg him, he’s a wicked man.. If u do not have anything doing for now please do find something to do, so he doesn’t abuse u financially too…. Cheers!
Don’t beg him please. What nonsense is that? I repeat do not beg him. And you didn’t do anything wrong asking him, for crying out loud, you are his wife not his maid.
Chai! We women have suffered. All these abuse because of marriage. God will help us. My dear sister i will advise you to keep your self busy. Look for something doing. Just do whatever you know that is your duties as a good wife. Ignore him. Make sure you take good care of yourself. Look good always and take good care of yourself and your son
You are too young for all these abuses. Men don’t value what they have till they loose it. Also be prayerful thank God there is no physical abuse .
This is emotional abuse and worse than physical abuse. Look for a job if you don’t have one and get really busy. This is a situation of an old fool behaving like a kindergarten.
sorry dear, you are married to a man who belong to a category of men that are wicked and selfish. they never see anything good in their wife but are threatened by her. the only way he can keep you in check is to ignore you and everything else people see that is good in you. he doesnt love you. the fact that he doesnt take you out is a confirmation of that. my own never goes out with me unless i will be paying the fares. he left over a decade and my life is better for it. please find something to occupy you and enhance your life. don’t expect love where there is none. i know you married him thinking he will pamper you. i learnt that bitter lesson that the wisdom of solomon have nothing to do with the age of methuselah. watch him carefully with that to confirm he is not guy
I think you should be prayerful and financially independent…
So you wouldn’t notice his actions
My dear don’t bring worry upon yourself, and please don’t ever think it is the age gap, no it’s not he is naturally that way. Always be happy no matter what, in case you have nothing doing, please engage yourself. Life has no duplicate. Ignore what he does, and when he comes to his right senses he will come looking for you.
You did nothing wrong, ignore him too. I don’t like men that behaves this way, he is taking advantage of you, but this time around ignore him, make a new year resolution to add more value to your life, always be on this page because it will educate, enlighten you on marriage issues, do not belittle yourself. Thanks
nothing wrong dear….he a baby man
He might be gay. Just saying
Exactly my story o, no difference, plus my hubby also goes out with a particular guy and there was one day I stumbled on his watsapp msg were the guy was asking him if he will sleep in his house when he starts staying alone and my hubby was like yes that he should prepare that he doesn’t eat small tins, men that day I was disappointed, my fellow women how una c tis mata, im not working for now and my hubby will not give me money, each time I ask he will say do I want to go and build house. Please guys advice me too
It is well o, age difference is one of these problem here, talking from experience, mine left me and I begged him, he ignored me so I had to let go. I’m adding value to my life in every way. My advice is create a better person in you.