Dear MIMsters: My Husband’s Ex Is Playing Games With Their Son

I am married with 3 kids and expecting the 4th. I got married to my boyfriend after 4 years of dating while we were in the university (300 level) cause I got pregnant for him. He paid my dowry and we wedded in church. Before now, he had an ex.

We were very young and it was tough on us but we scaled through and graduated with good results. He was more than my bedrock of strength.

While waiting for NYSC and equally expecting our 2nd child, one day, he told me that he had a son out of  wedlock. I was broken and planned to leave, but he pleaded that it happened before we met and the girl in question never told him about it and suddenly cut off all ties with him. She only called after the baby was born to break the news. We were already dating then and he never believed her. He said her story was contradictory. He wasn’t allowed to see the child either cos she insisted she would only permit him if he was coming to marry her and that he never agreed to.

He told me he offered to support her but she rejected all his efforts with the claim that her family has adopted and will carter for the baby.

Recently, when she found out he was married, she cursed him and constantly sent threatening SMS which he showed me. I told him to inform her that we are willing to take the boy and care for him and she replied “over her dead body.” He later got to find out her village and went in search of them. She threatened him not to come again until she was ready to introduce him.

Nobody in his family or mine knows about this child and I don’t know how to handle it anymore. She is now married but has still refused to grant him access to the child and sometimes sends mockery texts that he isn’t the biological father of the boy.

If truely he is my hubby’s son, I would want him to have have a relationship with his siblings while they are still young so that they will learn to love one another on time.

What should I do about this?