How To Handle Rude Comments From People During Pregnancy

Pregnancy often makes people around curious about your life. As a result, outsiders tend to ask what may seem like innocent questions or remarks, but often times such utterances actually come across as rude.

A pregnant woman deserves to hear compliments and encouraging things about herself and her unborn child. No matter how swollen or bloated a pregnant woman looks, it is wrong to comment about her physique. Why? Because people are different. Genetically and psychologically. The way one woman grows is totally different from another. One might not show until her 6th or 7th month, and another might start showing as early as 4 months!

It can be annoying when you are faced with certain rude questions during pregnancy, and it is especially painful when it comes from your family and close friends.

A lot of pregnant women find themselves being asked questions like:

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• Ah…mama ibeji…( mother of twins) – hello, do you suddenly have x- ray vision and can see the twins beneath my shirt, tummy and amniotic fluid? In Nigeria, some consider it a compliment, and some people find it rude. Could they be insinuating my tummy is too big? or I’m too fat?.
• Are you eating for two? – Yes. I’m eating for my village people
• You are gaining too much weight o! – Well yes my dear, I’m carrying another human being inside me
• hahah! Madam nosa!! – I’m aware that my nose is swelling and retaining water, does it affect your ability to breathe?
• I hope you will loose this weight after the baby o – Yes. I will put my new born child aside and start hoping to loose all the weight to please you
• You are too young to be have a child/Are you not to old to be pregnant – In this day and age, people still judge a person’s age by how old or young they look? Sigh.

The list of questions or comments could go on and on. How do you handle some of these questions when they get thrown at you? Here are a few tips:

1. As annoying and invasive as these questions might be, try to see the humor in them. Taking everything literally will only cause you more heartache that you can do well without at this point.
2. Be polite and put people in their place. It is not a crime, and certainly will not make you a rude person for telling someone that you find a question too personal and offensive
3. Learn to ignore questions you do not want to answer
4. Be Prepared! Your hormones are at its peak and your mama bear claws are sharp and ready. However, recognizing this and calming yourself down will actually help you a lot. Just keep in mind that some people may not really mean any harm by asking these questions/making these comments, they may not even know they are being offensive. Just be compassionate, and handle such inquiries with maturity.