Dear MIMsters: Am I A Gold Digger to Ask My Husband For This?
I sincerely need advice and your readers opinion on this issue in my marriage as my husband has called me a gold digger.
My hubby wants me to join him in his business but has refused to pay me an allowance or should I call it a salary. So, I declined and insisted that he pays me the sum of about 30k before I commit myself to his business.
I made this decision because of the so many bad experiences that I have had in this marriage for 10 years. He stopped me from running my own business that I have a passion for and threatened me with divorce if I disobeyed, so I obeyed.
SEE ALSO:Dear MIMsters: I Think I Have Endured Enough and Deserve to Have a Divorce
Yet, he’s not generous towards me but only gives me money for what I need and I’m ashamed to say I (almost 40 yr old) but do not have a savings. He knows and likes it that way.
I don’t feel financially secure in the marriage. He opened a life insurance for himself and education for his kids but none for me. I know he’s very buoyant. He also has workers who are secondary school leavers that he pays more than 30k.
I feel I deserve it as a finance graduate but he’s seriously angry now and calling me all sorts of names, saying that I’m a gold digger and love money too much.
Am I wrong to make such demand?
No you are not wrong. At almost 40, you need financial security, I mean what if something happens to him tomorrow? How do you women stay married to men that treat you like crap? How can a man threaten you with divorce? And you obliged him? You stopped your life to save your marriage, yet you are treated like this.
Hmmmmn most pettyy men are intimidated and scared of an independent strong woman…go get urself a job
Are you a gold digger? I would not have a clue. There are two sides to every story. Stop asking for opinions that might justify your sense of victimhood. Go get a job and your own bank account. Perhaps even start that business up if you have the gumption. You can also just get a divorce, take half, and move on. Be warned though, if your husband is not loaded, you will most likely have to get a job after divorcing.
You want a 30k sign on bonus? That is almost unheard of unless one has mad skills, intellect, experience, etc. Why don’t you separate money from the equation of your relationship. Go get a job or zip it.