Life Coach, Solomon Buchi, Faults Reality Star, Tobi Bakre’s Mum’s ‘Patriarchal’ Advice On Marriage

Nigerian life coach, writer, and motivational speaker, Solomon Buchi has taken an exception to marital advice dished by mum of Big Brother Naija reality TV star, Tobi Bakre and he did not mince words while doing so.

In a 1 minute long video, Tobi had engaged his mum and dad in a chat as they celebrated their 29th wedding anniversary. The former housemate urged his parents on about marital advice, considering how far they had come with theirs and it is his mum’s remarks in that video that has irked Buchi who has called all she had to say ‘CRAP”.

In the video, Tobi’s mum encouraged wives to not check their husband’s phones, and that they should be grateful that their man comes home to them, even if he keeps other relationships outside. She essentially dismissed the possibilities that a relationship with such one-sided expectations could have some effect on the women involved.

But again, it has worked for her for 29 long years and maybe she has a point, but Buchi is having none of it, saying women should stop telling men its okay to be irresponsible and treat them badly.

The writer and feminist made a number of points in his lengthy post and it was obvious just how repugnant and misleading he found her assertions.

Read Buchi’s full text below:

THIS IS CRAP!@tobibakre ’s mom shared tips on how to hold up your marriage as a woman on their 29th marriage anniversary and this is one sad thing I’ve heard recently..It is horrendous to know that women still think this way, and moreso a woman who has a son and daughters. Is this what she’d pass to them?

Habilitating men’s irresponsibility and lack of commitment in marriage relationships?.This is total crap. If a woman is expected to give full commitment, why shouldn’t a man do so too? She even said the woman should be happy at least that he married her, and she shouldn’t complain if he goes out.

This is disturbing, and even more that some young women also think this way. Marriage is no effing trophy for women and they must not take any crap in it just because a man feels he’s given her some medal by getting married to her..

It’s high time we called men to their senses. We should stop fostering this menace. Commitment is not exclusive to the female gender..This mindset of ‘let him be as far as he comes back home and takes care of you’ is ludicrous.

What if he brings back diseases and infects you? Even if he doesn’t infect you, it’s total disrespect on the marriage to have mistresses outside. It is emotional abuse..Dear modern woman, this is the last thing you should ever do.

If your hubby is a serial cheat. Walk away! Somehow men still cheat because they know women will make up excuses and settle for them.
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You won’t take all this poo when you stop seeing having a man like a trophy, because you’ll go for a quality man, not just a chauvinistic and misogynistic animal with a dangling joystick that knows no boundaries.

She talked about how other women will take over if you leave your cheating hubby. Phew! It’s either you have the whole of a man or no man at all.

Man no be life. Let others come and take over the crap please..The counsel in this video should never be taken serious. It is old fashioned, obtuse, dehumanizing and doesn’t say anything beautiful about women getting married..

When I say our parents took a lot of crap just to stay together but that’s ending. It has to be a marriage filled with love and commitment or no marriage at all.

See his post below:

https://www.instagram.com/p/Bw97kVNDTih/

Watch the video below: