Dear MIMsters: I Want Him So Much But I Don’t Know How To Handle His Behaviour

Mimsters, I need you to assist me with practical and candid opinions on how to handle this man I want so much.

I am a working single mum of a 4-year-old child and I have had my own quota of a bad marriage. My marriage lasted for only 2 years. Since then, I’ve been skeptical about men.

January this year, I decided to give love a chance again and started dating this vibrant young man. The experience has been cool, I must say, as he has actually rekindled the fire in me.

However, during this COVID19 pandemic lockdown, he lost his job but I tried my best to calm him down assuring him that all will be well soon. I also made him understand that I have not been with him for the sake of money, all I wanted was to have inner peace.

Then, I began to notice some changes in him. He started withdrawing from the way he used to reach me, but I tried making excuses for him that he could no longer afford to buy airtime, hence I became the one always calling and texting most of the time. Actually, I found out that I have been wrong because whenever I am with him, he calls his friends especially, female friends.

I noticed that he loves being adored by women and also being in the company of women. I’m someone with this attitude of crawling back into my shell and ignoring people once I notice that they no longer care about me and for someone with such experiences as mine, little things irritate me.

I have done this twice, and at one occasion, he told me that once he notices that a woman is acting up, he will ignore her until she gets back to her senses. So, I gradually started withdrawing from reaching out to him and he started complaining. Even at that, I tried my best to put in the little effort I can to sustain the relationship.

Recently, he wanted to make out with me and I told him that I was in my period and he wasn’t happy about that. I offered to give him a BJ and he was good. Days later, I was with him again and he requested for sex again, but I told him that I was ovulating and he got pissed. I then told him that he has refused to use condoms and that I am not yet ready to have a baby because we both do not have a solid income to sustain and cater for a baby now.

He felt insulted and I had to apologize before leaving, and he actually assured me that he wasn’t angry. I got home and called to inform him that I’m home but I got a cold response from him. This got me thinking the next morning, then I decided to ignore him for a while and see his reactions.

It has been 11 days since then and he hasn’t bothered to reach me. This action is presently driving me nuts, but I have determined to stand my ground not to go to him if he doesn’t look out for me. But I’m scared of losing him as I have fallen in love with him. However, I do not want to appear desperate but I also do not want to appear like I have too much ego. Truth be told, I am really missing him. Please help a Mimster.