Nollywood actress, Lilian Ogechi Esoro has now offered an insight into what really happened with her marriage to music executive, Ubi Franklin.
During a recent chat with Vlogger, Toke Makinwa, Lilian who share a son with Ubi revealed that her marriage had been shaky right from the engagement. According to her, people close to her blamed her for going into the marriage despite seeing the red flags.
She told Toke:
“Here’s what people don’t know, my marriage had been shaky from engagement. Some people always say, ‘you shouldn’t have gone ahead with the marriage at all’. But, when I think about it, I made the right decision.
Now, my son is very important to me. With everything that happened, when I want to feel sad, I show that. Social media is trying to push the narrative that marriage isn’t important but actually is.
I was reading something and a working lady was saying it was until she got married that people started respecting her. The reason people see marriage as a problem is that we’ve lost time having conversations.
Go out for dinner anywhere and everyone is on their phone when dinner is meant for you to see the environment and reminisce on things. People are scared from the beginning of relationships to let the other know about them.”
In 2016, there were rumours that the celebrity couple have separated but the two parties didn’t make any comment to confirm or deny the speculations.
In 2019, Ubi allegedly filed for divorce in an Abuja court, but the judge threw out the case. On January 28th, 2021, the divorce was finalized, at an Abuja court, with Lilian taking custody of their son, Jayden. The couple had a lengthy divorce trial and this took a toll on Lilian’s mental health.
She slid into depression and had to seek help. She got help and decided to speak about her issues during a rare Instagram LIVE session with Pastor Bolaji Idowu, the Lead Pastor of Harvesters International Christian Centre (HICC) on Monday, December 5th, 2022.
This was the first time Ubi was going to address her issues and the discussion turned out to be revealing as she openly talked about her struggles with depression and the steps she took to get out.
The CEO of the Lioca Group, which includes a spa business as well as a skincare brand, said depression and other mental health issues are not talked about as much as they should be in this part of the world.
“It is not something I think anyone should go through, and I was there. I’ve had my fair share; to be very honest with you, I almost threw in the towel.
“Again, we should be mindful of the people we surround ourselves with. I just wanted to be away from everybody; at that time, I’m sure many people noticed. At that point, I even stopped appearing on screen. I just lost interest in everything and everyone. I crawled into a shell that I’m wondering where it went to now.”
The mother of one also revealed how her battle with depression led her to birth a foundation in 2017 to help other women going through the same struggles. She said:
“In my depressed state, I thought my life was entirely over. What more could I do? My acting career, how long can it sustain me? I just had a lot of things in my head.
“As a single mum, I have extra baggage; how do I go about it? How do I move about it? This is something that God has bestowed on top of me. Am I ready for this? And sometimes, I found the courage. Bless her soul, and my mum also played a huge part in helping me.”
To help herself, the 40-year-old actress said she threw herself into work, day and night. She added,
“I took on jobs nonstop. I took on jobs back to back, and I was not relenting. I was working tirelessly like a mad person. I could count how many times I slept on my bed because it was from one set to another.
“I’m just here to encourage those who feel their life is over wherever they think they’re, even if they are single parents. Believe it or not, it’s not the end of your life. It’s something that I feel I need to tell a lot of people. Don’t stay down.”
The first step towards healing, she said, was to forgive herself. In her words:
“I’m now open to having a relationship and having an open mind because when you expect too much, they might end up failing you.
So I’m going with an open heart and an open mind, new blessings, everything new and fresh. If it happens, it happens. If it doesn’t, we have many goals. I will focus my energy on more creative things rather than the hurt, pain and baggage. It’s over and done.”
