Dear MIMsters: I Am Scared of Having an Abortion Again But This Is My Predicament

I’ve been following posts on your Facebook page and I can say nice and mature advice comes from there. I am scared of having an abortion again but I am faced with this predicament.

I’m a 26 years old.  Ten years ago, I was a victim of rape and I got pregnant. I didn’t know I was pregnant until I was three months gone. My mum took me for a DNC since the father of the child was no where to be found.

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Since then, any relationship I enter, I would remember the incidence and after a while will break up especially when sex is involved. This has seen me enter and leave lots of relationships.

In 2012, when I was in my second year in the University, I met a man on Facebook who was 13 years older than me. I loved him so much and we got along so well. A year after, he proposed but I told him to relax a little because I was just 20 and besides my parents felt I was too young.

He felt he couldn’t wait, so he broke up with me and got married to someone else. He was the only one I loved.

Then, I started with my old ways of jumping in and out of relationships, hoping it would be better but it wasn’t. So, I gave relationships a 2 year pause.

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Early this year, I reconnected with an old school mate and we started dating. I told him no sex and he agreed but one day we were caught up in the moment and we did it. Now, I realize I love him like that first man I loved.

I’m pregnant with his baby but that’s not the issue. The issue is that he’s just starting his life and I have no real job. I sew but jobs do not come in daily. People owe me and all. I know we can’t afford having a baby now, considering the expenses but I’m scared of having an abortion again. Please what can I do?