Dear MIMsters: How Do I Handle My Wife’s Family?

I am short of wisdom and need your advice on this issue. I write in tears. I got married in 2009. When I came for introduction, my wife’s family received me well. But when I came back for the traditional marriage and white wedding, I met a different reception but my wife remained with me through all the struggles.

One of her older sisters insisted that my wife shouldn’t marry me again for reasons best known to her. This delayed the marriage for some time but finally they approved and gave us their blessings.

For 3 years, we had no children. This generated another heat. One weekend, my wife went to visit her  mother and when she got there, they gathered to persuade her not to come back. That Monday morning, they didn’t know when she sneaked out and left, and went straight to work. I equally traveled for the weekend, unaware of what had happened, I tried to reach her on phone but it was switched off . They tried to reach her also but couldn’t.

I got back and after a while, my mother in-law and a female stranger showed up. I took them to the sitting room and offered them drink but they declined. My mother in-law asked of my wife, and I innocently replied that she should be in school. “I have come to take her back, the marriage is over, I carried her for 9 months in my womb” were her words. I was confused. I went to the school, found my wife and picked her up. We got home not knowing that they were hiding somewhere. This time, my MIL, her two daughters, the older sister who kicked against our union and that stranger rushed into the compound and tried to drag my wife out. That incidence made her lose her 2 months and 3 weeks pregnancy.

These people were shouting on top of their voices, calling me names; my MIL called me a cultist, she said I used my wife’s womb for money ritual. My wife felt bad and resisted them. It took passers-by who gathered as a result of their commotion to dismiss them. Even when my wife gave birth to her first baby, they came to the hospital aggressively claiming they wanted to pray for her because they discovered that I would kill her during delivery. This made me angrily send them out of the hospital. Since then, I have not seen them again. I have gone round to all their relations calling them back for reconciliation but they turned deaf ears to my calls. Though my wife is not bothered by their absence, for she felt insulted. What do I do, do I go and beg them? Though I am innocent of their baseless accusations. I am a born again Christian and will find no reason to soil my hands in any vain thing and that is my wife’s confidence.