How To Put Your Frightened Toddler At Ease In These Situations (Part 1)

By Eyinade Eweje

Do you have a frightened toddler on your hands who’s afraid of the dark, masked faces, teddy bears, strangers or a trip to the hospital? Toddler fears are quite numerous, vary from one child to the other, and should be expected as they grow and start trying to develop clear perceptions of what’s safe or real and what’s not.

Generally, it’s important to acknowledge these fears, play along with their vivid imaginations, be re-assuring, create pleasant associations, curtail their exposure to scary scenes, tales and contents on TV or elsewhere, avoid threatening them with their fears and offer praise whenever they display acts of bravery. In the long run, these empower them to feel and act more secure.

SEE ALSO:A Mum Shares: “Why I Don’t Share My Kids’ Lives With My 300 Facebook Friends”

Discover tricks to ease your frightened toddler:

 1. The dark

A couple of adults too can also relate with this. With no illumination to flee from potential hazards, your tot feels unprotected; there’s a somewhat fear of the unknown.

What To Do
To curb this fear, don’t leave him by himself in the dark. Try to explain the concept of day and night. Have a torchlight or fluorescent you can easily reach for and switch on if there’s a sudden power outage at night and re-assure him of your presence while you turn it on. It may also help to explain why the light went off in the first place. Show him the new source of light and holding his hands, turn it off and on intermittently to show him it suddenly gets very dark when lights go off at night and it helps to sit still and not scream or cry till mummy or daddy turns on an alternative source. As he gets accustomed to this, praise his efforts and take him on occasional night walks in your compound, pointing out exciting things about night time, like the cool breeze.

2.  Bedtime

A whole lot of factors may make your tot dread bedtime, namely: fear of being alone all night with lights turned off ‘monsters’invading his room, having nightmares and so on. Ask your child why he won’t go to or stay in bed.

What To Do
If your child won’t because the lights are off, turn on a night light and leave the bedroom door open, promising to check on him regularly. Of course, you should fulfill that promise.
Ensure he has a favourite comfort object to keep him feeling secure till he falls asleep and when he wakes up during the night.

If he won’t go to bed because of monsters under his bed or in the ceiling, offer to search his entire room together before bedtime for these figments of his imagination.
You could also paste ‘No Monsters Allowed’ on his bedroom door, fill a spray bottle with water and have him spray the room assuring him that no monster dares come close now that the room is sprayed.

SEE ALSO:7 Ways To Discipline A Toddler Without Spanking (Part One)

Fear of nightmares may also make bedtime a bad time. Instead of running to his room to bring him to yours because he’s screaming and won’t go back to sleep, remain calm, comfort him in his room and assure him he’s safe. You should stay with him till he feels comfortable and sleeps off again. Meanwhile, minimise his exposure to frightening or scary experiences during the day.

3. Masks, Costumes, Mascots

Your little boy or girl does not understand the concept behind those weird looking mascots, including Santa and the mega sized Mickey Mouse you’re desperate to have him take pictures with. Toddlers easily conjure varieties of frightening images in their mind’s eye that stop them from moving an inch close.

What To Do
So, don’t plead or push if he won’t have anything to do them; you’ll end up scaring him even more. Let him hold your hand and watch from afar while other kids hug the costumed characters. Watching their reactions from a safe distance may help him realize they are harmless after all. Playing dress-up with your tot frequently will also help him understand costumes are all about having fun.

4. Strangers

Your tot feels, “I’ve never seen this face before, don’t know what he or she is up to, so I’d better hold on tight to mummy or daddy for protection.” Though this is a healthy thought, it does get a tad ugly when your child keeps a distance from even friends and relatives just because their face aren’t familiar. Basically, it helps to give him time to get to know people before expecting any cordial interaction.

What To Do
An expert suggests being by your child’s side as he interacts with new people and constantly modelling friendly behaviours. If he’s shy, it also helps to warn visiting friends and relatives that it might take some time for him to warm up to them. Consider letting them in on activities or games he loves so they can capitalise on them to win him over. 

SEE ALSO:5 Major Skills Your Child Needs To Be Successful (Part One)

NOTE:

Your toddler’s fears won’t vanish overnight, so it’s important that you exercise lots of patience. Don’t hesitate to seek advice from other experienced parents, there will definitely be a lot more to learn. However, if you try all you can and he gets even worse, talk to a doctor or child psychologist.