Dear MIM: “After all these, would you advice me to stay married to him?”
I am currently going through a lot of emotional stress and some health issues because my husband is a serial cheat who is involved in none less than 20 women.
I’m still young with 2 kids under 3 years and living in the diaspora. He’s the worst liar I’ve ever met in my life. He can’t even take care of his responsibilities financially. I’ve told him he needs to leave very soon as I can’t leave the rest of my life this way.
I caught an STD but thank God I’ve got the all clear. He gets angry if I insists he uses a condom when we want to have sex telling me that he has stopped sleeping about. I’ve told him I own my body and that he’s disrespecting me.
Let me tell me you, emotional stress (mental health) is just as bad as domestic violence. I was a good wife to him and he would be no where in life without me. He’s excuse for not wanting to separate is that he loves the kids and won’t want not to be in their lives everyday. Like heck, did you ever stop to think of this when you were gallivanting about? Trust doesn’t exist anymore.
He says I’m wicked and have an unforgiving heart. Really?? That if I can forgive him then I will see reasons to want to stay in the marriage. I know at some point, I would forgive him but to stay married to him is a big NO. I’ve gone for counselling, read books, prayed etc and nothing is working. It is said that “once a cheat always a cheat”. I struggle a lot with this hurt and betrayal and atimes feel this marriage could work, but he keeps lying even for the simplest things. He always says to me I’m the one with the problem that he doesn’t need counselling. This month makes it a year since I found out and my health has suffered over this time. This is a new year and I need to be well for myself and kids. I’ve got a bright future ahead and can’t see him in the picture. My dear mothers, after all of these would you advise me to still stay? My family is going to object to this move but I wear the shoes here! I’m going to find the strength to see this through and I will come out victorious.#newyear#new life
You better leave that cheat of a man and concentrate on yourself and kids.
Dear sister, please quit. You deserve better
Speechless
If infidelity alone is the only problem,sex should be ruled out but if you must,insist on a condom.Another STD might be deadly.If I were you,l would live like he doesn’t exist.At the end of the day,you are the one wearing the shoes and knows where it pinches.
My dear I dnt even know wat to say but if really u dnt want to continue seek for a divorce
Chie I pity this woman God is ur strength
Do not give in to his emotional blackmail. You do not need your parents consent to stay alive and healthy, its a choice you make for yourself bearing in mind first your children, they need you the most, stay alive for them without a second thought, and if moving on guarantees that please do not look back. Stay strong.
Hmmmmmmm
Hmmm whatever makes you happy dear. This life is too short to waste it.
Please just leave that marriage and go before you die there. God will see you through
Do what makes u happy darling God is your strength
You deserve to be happy dear, plz move on with your life
New year, new life!!!! Am rolling with hat last statement. Send that thing out of your house and outta your life fast, you need to be happy and healthy to carter for your kids. Don’t allow anyone put your life on hold.
Eyaaaa
Yr happiness is important
That cheat is using you and abusing you. You deserve better dearie.
Na wa o
u dnt seem lik u need any advice .u no what to do already so wat are u waitn for
Guess u know better
It is well with this institution called marriage
Whatever u decide sister,stay strong.God is ur strenght.
May God help u
God will be with you
talk to him about the two of you going to counselling
From now on make up your agenda to always pray for him
For God to change his character, mean it with all your heart.
Try two of you going for deliverance.
I am also in ur shoes. As u spoke. It was like u were talking about my husband. Only difference is that he meets his financial obligations and i stayed for, 12 yrs. The emotional toture is worse than physical abuse. I was afraid i would run mad from his lies. His cheating was pathological. Infact. I cant say it all but last year i had the courage to leave. It has been one of the best decisions i have taken in my life. I have not regreted it for a second. He keeps saying all sorts. But i dont care anymore. People say he will still regret it but i really dont care if he does or not. I met a guy who thinks the world of me. Seperated too. Caught his wife with another man on their matrimonial bed. So its like we share same past. I am working on a divorce. Wishing him the best.