Dear MIMsters: Am I Dating The Wrong Guy?

I am so confused at the moment and don’t have friends to talk to.

I am 29 years old and presently dating a guy who studies abroad and wants to meet my people by December. However, I am not so excited about it. First, this guy is not near the mental representation of who I have always wanted my husband to be – he is not physically attractive, and speaks very terrible English. I understand we are all learning and not perfect, but my guy would call wristwatch ‘richwatch’, asunder ‘assundance’. In short, he cannot make a correct sentence without very obvious mistakes even with his third degree. Bearing in mind that no one is perfect, I overlooked these flaws though I’m not happy about it.

However, my main concern is his attitude. I think he is too arrogant. When we have a misunderstanding, he doesn’t initiate reconciliation. He finds it very hard to apologize. When he does something to me and I complain and ask him if he would be happy if I do same to him, he would say he’s a man and I am a woman. He says things like, ‘you don’t have the liver to get angry with me’. He always says he’s a very principled man, adding that if there’s anything he doesn’t like in me and cannot correct, he will call off the relationship. He advised me to do the same too.

Since we started the relationship in January, he has called it off twice. On the first occasion, he said I didn’t tell him on time about an application I paid for. I intentionally did that because I didn’t want him to stress himself paying for me because he’s still studying. When I told him afterwards, he called it off saying I’m not straightforward. I had to explain and beg before we continued.

The second time was when I was sick and my phone was off for 3 days. He only came online and called my name without asking what happened. I was sad when I came online 3 days later to see only my name. He insisted I must explain why I intentionally decided to put off my phone for 3 days. I said I would not explain until he asks what happened to me that made me go offline and he said he’s too big to ask such a question. That was when I told him he’s arrogant and full of himself. Again, he called our relationship off, saying he doesn’t want a wife that will be insulting him. I had to beg again.

Now, we are not on talking terms because he wanted to see my breast through video call and I declined. I am a virgin and believe I should be whole in full and not in part. He got angry, accusing me of being a disobedient and stubborn future wife. He insists I apologize sincerely, even after I have casually said I am sorry just for peace’s sake.

I have refused to ‘sincerely apologize’ and he has stopped talking to me. Please, advise me on what to do. I don’t want to rush into conclusion since in the time past, friends have accused me of being too selective and temperamental.