Dear MIMster: Am I Overreacting Over This Issue that Could Cause a Family Problem?
I need advice on how to handle this family problem and please tell me if you think I’m overreacting.
Been married for 2 years plus with a 15-months-old son and we live in a 2-bedroom apartment. I work in a bank while hubby works with health care. Due to our busy schedule and the need for someone to help look after our son when he comes back from creche, we went to beg my sister-in-law to release one of her four daughters to stay with us. She is only 14 years and we registered her in a private school. She presently occupies the second room meant for my baby. I converted it to her room, while I moved my baby to our own room.
A second relative to my hubby who is a 21-year old male cousin to this little girl just moved in from Lagos, temporally into my home because of proximity to his school. I welcomed him to my home and treat both of them as my younger ones, but instructed him to always sleep in the living room, which he does.
Now this is the issue. Two nights ago, hubby told the young man to go join his cousin in the room as he (hubby) needed to read in the sitting room. I woke up to find out that they slept on the same bed. I didn’t say anything.
Second night came, same thing happened and U know it will gradually be a trend as his exam is a month away. I went to the room and saw them sleeping on same bed. I instructed the boy to go take his position in the parlour, but hubby came after me to say that I should let them be as they see themselves as siblings and I only have A CORRUPT mind as a result of my corrupt up bringing.
I’m so mad about his statement, as he is so naive and does not know molestation can come through anybody. I am seriously thinking of asking the young man to move into his school hostel as I know this will create trouble between his mum (another sister- in-law) and I but I do not want anything to happen to this little girl. Or am I over reacting for nothing sake?
You are not overreacting oh. That girl is under your care and you need to protect her like she’s yours. The devil uses little things like this sleeping together on the same bed. If there’s a hostel available for him to move to, then he should by all means go because even if not at night, day time when they are together and you both at work, anything can happen. We have heard too many stories already to let it happen to us.
My sister you didn’t over react, your husband’s behavior is like that of a child. Does he not live in this planet? How could he be so insensitive to this kinda issue? Molestation and abuse happen between father and daughter these days how is he not paying attention to details? Please do what you’ve got to do as a good mother for the sake of that innocent girl before it gets too late. #Nobodyshouldbetrusted.
u not over reacting at all oooo if fathers can jlp with dial daughter down anytn can happn
Pls ure nt overreacting ooooo…..pls dnt allow it at alll……it is either he sleeps in the living room or leaves the house completely….it is totally wrong….they are both young and might b naive…and the devil might take advantage of that..besides even siblings this days commit abominable act…..not to talk of distant relatives…..if it happens,she might b scared to speak out ooo
see you have done the best.just try to convince your hubby.but they must not sleep together
you r not overreacting at all. how can your husband be so naive. let the young man go to the school hostel. pls I beg you save that girls from possible molestation.
Your husband is so naive(I’m sorry to say). Please take it easy. Talk to him at his happy mood and do that in a loving way. It’s only when he refuses that you can take matters in your hands