Dear MIMsters: How would you handle this issue if you were in my shoes?
I’m a single lady in my late twenties who met this guy about 6 ago. He’s been asking me out and I gave in after 2 years. He told me he doesn’t want sex and suggested to wait until we get married. I didn’t think this was an issue.
I had several worried about him. First, he’s a Muslim while I am a Christian. My Christian family will never want to hear of me getting married to a Muslim. Secondly, I just graduated while he’s still an undergraduate. He is likely to graduate next year.
Thirdly, even though we agreed not to have sex, last year, I told him we should try it out and we did. What I observed is troubling me. I noticed that despite all the foreplay, he didn’t have an erection. It took a long time and his joystick was dropping in the process. I thought he might just be anxious, so I let it be. We didn’t do it again till this year. When we did, I noticed the same thing. The third time it happend, it was worse, as in there was no reaction at all. I had to ask him what the problem was. Is it anxiety? I asked how long has this been going on. And he said a year. I told him the first time we did it was when I first noticed it so it must have been going on longer than that.
I asked what he has done about it and he said nothing because he feels it’s something that will go with time, and doesn’t need any drugs and hasn’t told anyone. After I persuaded him to get help, he did and has been on medication since. The problem is that there has been no improvement even till now. It’s the same as always. What should I do?
This things don’t work over night. It takes time. it’s obvious you love him. Just give it a little more time, if no improvements, then seek help some place else.
Hmmmm I don’t get it, why will you go into a relationship that deep in your heart you aren’t happy about, first religion, your parent will be against it, secondly you noticed his joystick on the first, second attempt, you still continue to try, now that it is obvious, you want to abandon him
quit the relationship. you already know it has no future
Follow your heart
Pls just call it quits.. the guy was not even honest enough to tell u abt his challenge until u asked him and he still lied about d fact dt it started a yr ago. I am sure he is hiding some other things from you. The issue of religon is also something you need to consider.. can two walk together except they agree? Do not be blinded by the love you have for him …..