Dear MIMsters: My Mums Has Never Accepted Me But I Need Her Now More Than Ever

I need my mum more now than ever but she has never accepted me.

My mum and dad separated when I was still in secondary school.

After their separation, one day, my grandmother who is now late informed me that my mum was pregnant. In my young mind, I was happy but asked her if the baby was my father and what I received in return was insults.

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My grandmother got upset started abusing me. I said all sorts back to her out of anger which I never meant. I went to visit my mother afterwards and saw things for myself. I said to myself, “she’s still my mum and I will support her in all things.”

I helped in running her business but somehow my grandmother and her sister called my mum and told her to be careful with me that I said I will kill her and destroy any man who is responsible for her pregnancy. Since then, I have noticed certain changes about her attitude towards me.

One day, I went to offload her business and out of excitement, I forgot to take stock of the goods offloaded. When I got home and she asked me if I counted them, I told her I forgot to count them. She got upset and started saying things out of anger. She told me to pray not to give birth to a girl because if I do, she will not care about me.

I cried throughout the day because my mother has never been this way to me and since then till now, her position and words towards me has remained same.

At this time, I need to purchase my JAMB form and she declined buying it for me. It was her brother who is now late that gave me the money to get a JAMB form. I passed my exams and secured an admission and she told me she has no money to pay my fees. Again, her brother came to my rescue and paid my school fees. Years later, my mum kicked me out of the house because I challenged the man responsible for her pregnancy.

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I’m 28 years old now, yet my mum and I are still warring over what I don’t know and she’s never accepted me like her daughter. We are not even on speaking terms. I’m 2 months pregnant for a man who wants to marry me and I do not know how to go forward with this. I need her help now more than ever.