Dear MIMsters: My Mums Has Never Accepted Me But I Need Her Now More Than Ever
I need my mum more now than ever but she has never accepted me.
My mum and dad separated when I was still in secondary school.
After their separation, one day, my grandmother who is now late informed me that my mum was pregnant. In my young mind, I was happy but asked her if the baby was my father and what I received in return was insults.
READ ALSO:Dear MIMsters: Something Quite Strange About My Marriage Has Brought Me to this Conclusion
My grandmother got upset started abusing me. I said all sorts back to her out of anger which I never meant. I went to visit my mother afterwards and saw things for myself. I said to myself, “she’s still my mum and I will support her in all things.”
I helped in running her business but somehow my grandmother and her sister called my mum and told her to be careful with me that I said I will kill her and destroy any man who is responsible for her pregnancy. Since then, I have noticed certain changes about her attitude towards me.
One day, I went to offload her business and out of excitement, I forgot to take stock of the goods offloaded. When I got home and she asked me if I counted them, I told her I forgot to count them. She got upset and started saying things out of anger. She told me to pray not to give birth to a girl because if I do, she will not care about me.
I cried throughout the day because my mother has never been this way to me and since then till now, her position and words towards me has remained same.
At this time, I need to purchase my JAMB form and she declined buying it for me. It was her brother who is now late that gave me the money to get a JAMB form. I passed my exams and secured an admission and she told me she has no money to pay my fees. Again, her brother came to my rescue and paid my school fees. Years later, my mum kicked me out of the house because I challenged the man responsible for her pregnancy.
READ ALSO:Dear MIMsters: After His Wife Called Me, I Started Feeling Differently About Him
I’m 28 years old now, yet my mum and I are still warring over what I don’t know and she’s never accepted me like her daughter. We are not even on speaking terms. I’m 2 months pregnant for a man who wants to marry me and I do not know how to go forward with this. I need her help now more than ever.
You have to summon up some courage and sit your mom down ask her some questions, where all the rift started from and why. If she can clearly state the reasons why she has been so mean to you all these years, then you go down on your kneels and apologize. She has been mean even before you challenge his hubby. Let her know the reason why you ask the questions is because you want to know where you wronged her so you can apologize I’m pretty sure she will come around. If she doesn’t, get the attention of other members of the family to talk her, if she refused still then you can now go ahead with the marriage with the support of other members of the family.
Go to your mom and tell her about it. Be prepared for whatever way she would react or things she will say to you. If she’s not willing to be there for you then keep your distance.
Arrange a meeting with your mum and ask her why she treats you the way she does. Apologise and ask for her forgiveness, irrespective of the reasons she may give for the bad treatment.
Remember to pray about the situation always.
I wish you all the best.