Dear MIMsters: Should I Believe My Baby Daddy This Time?
Should I believe baby daddy this time?
I need advice from people on this page. I have been dating my children’s father since 2012. We had an official introduction and he promised my family he will come and conclude every marital rite.
But before then, I got pregnant to which he said we will conclude our marital rites after I give birth. I did give birth, then reminded him but he told me to wait until he has money. I have waited for him and I keep pressuring him but he still complains of having no money.
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Anytime he has money, he won’t come back home early, he will go and drink until he gets drunk. He’ll take his friends out and beat me if I speak up. He beats and insults me and even extends it to my family and I will just keep quiet!
The last time my mum was on my neck for us to conclude on the marital rites, I told him and he said he had no money. I was doing everything to push him to hasten up but he’s unbothered. I even told him that I will save my salary to help him foot some bills but he refused and said that he will try his best.
Now, I have two boys for him and he is still not serious. I am tired of talking. To make matters worse, he dates both old and young women and widows. If I confront him, he’ll beat the hell out of me, so I don’t talk about it anymore.
I am working in Calabar while he lives PortHarcourt. In December of last year, I told him to give me money to send to my mum for Christmas and his response was, have I asked him if he has eaten.
When his boss was leaving PH, he gave him lots of money. I told him to use that money to fulfill his promise to me but all he did was to change everything in his house with the money and spent the remaining on friends, drinks and women.
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Since February, he has had no job. I have been the one fending for the children. I don’t know what to do anymore. I use to spend my leave with him and anytime we have issues, he will not sleep at home. He will pack some of his clothes and go for at least three days before he returns. The last time he came back, he told me that he was sorry that he got a woman pregnant for him and that she is now 7 months pregnant. He said they will have abort it and promised me that it will never happen again. I am really confused and I don’t know what to do.
I need your advice as he claims that he loves me.
What are you still doing with such a man? Can’t you see he is not ready to marry you? You are too available that’s why he is unserious. Give him space please in short break up with him. There’s no rule that says your baby daddy must be your husband. Try and date again. How do you want to even marry a man that cheats and beats you?
Madam, this is too much, and you’re pressurizing him to marry you. He cheats and beats you. Haba, this is big. I know he didn’t start the beating and cheating after you got pregnant for him, and you still went ahead to have two. Aunty, admit you made a mistake and pray for God to help you.