Dear MIMsters: I Am Bored In This Marriage But My Blood Pressure is Skyrocketing
My hubby is always fond of accusing me of having an affair even though in our 10 years of marriage, he has never seen me with anyone. Even though I am bored in this marriage, my blood pressure has taken a rise.
I was working before he succeeded in making me stop. He started a business for me which at a point was mandatory for me to travel out to buy goods to restock but he refused. He convinced me to close the business and stay home to take care of the children, saying that he would think of a more suitable business for me.
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All the time I was either working or doing business, he always accused me of either going out with my boss or colleagues. Some people might say, I might have done something to him to make him believe so, but you see, I was an extrovert when he married me, very carefree and told him everything that happened to me whenever I got back from work which always resulted in a fight. So, I learnt how to keep my mouth shut.
The worst is, I can’t visit my friends, attend a wedding or programme. If I go for any event, we will quarrel for over a week or more. He is only cool with it when the event is from his own side. He is happier seeing me sitting at home. When I complain about this, he start to shout.
He is not in town now and just because he video called me and my phone was off, he sent me a stinker accusing me of having other plans and refused picking my calls when I called him back.
I really can not continue like this as I am tired of explaining myself. When I ever get to go out, when it’s 6 0’clock, I will start to panic like a baby.
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This whole situation is draining me and making me lose my self esteem. When people see me, they don’t know all is not well. They think I am living my best life, not knowing that I am depressed and cannot even encourage myself now.
Two things I need help with are…
1)I really need to get a job(not necessarily about the money but to put my brain to use) or learn a skill.
2)How do I stop all his accusations from getting to me? My blood pressure has increased due to this and I am dying of boredom from sitting at home and doing nothing.