Dear MIMsters: Was I Wrong To Have Walked Out For This Reason?

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I live alone with my 3 children because hubby works outside the country and he only comes to Nigeria every December. We have been married for 12 years now and only stayed together for the first 5 years of our marriage. On every sides, I am grateful to God that I have a great home. I trust my husband and he does me, too. Our children are doing very well. Once in a while, hubby won’t come home but we will go to him to spend our December. I can confidently say that all things are good with my home. Glory be to God.

This is where my challenge is.

My hubby’s siblings.

They do not know where to draw the line. They behave like I do not matter in my own home. Even though hubby foots the bill almost a 100%, I also have a good business that yields good profit so we are adequately financially comfortable.

2 Saturdays ago, as early as 7a.m, there was a knock on our gate and I asked my 1st son to go see who could be visiting us that early in the morning. We were just rounding off our morning prayers when we heard the knock at the gate.

It was both my husband’s immediate elder and younger sisters who had come with some of their friends. My hubby’s immediate younger sister was to have her introduction that day and they chose my home as the venue to receive her intended husband’s people. That wouldn’t have been a big deal if they had considered telling me before hand. When I asked why I was not informed, they said they informed my hubby about it and that it was not in their place to tell me about their plans.

I put a call through to my husband and he apologized for not telling me. He however said he told his elder sis to call me and inform me about it.

I confronted my hubby’s elder sis about what her brother said and she said, “Am I not telling you about it now? As long as your husband was informed, why do I need to tell you again? Shouldn’t you be happy that your sister’s in-law husband people want to meet us? Please, I don’t have time for long talk this morning. Where can we rent chairs from because we are expecting about 30 people from her husband’s side. Don’t worry, we are not asking you to provide refreshments, we have contracted that out to caterers who will be here soon. And we have enough hands to help us with the arrangements. We only need to use your compound.”

So I told them they were welcome to use my compound.

I told my children to take their bath, dress up, then I did the same and when we were done, we bade my SILs and their guests good-bye, looked the door leading to the main house but we left the guest quarters and the compound they needed to use for them, and I drove out with my children- We spent the whole day out as a family.

Now, hubby is upset with me saying that after he had apologized to me, I should have given him the honour and stay in the house with them so I told him what his sister said but he still insisted that even then, I should have honoured him.

Please, was I wrong to have walked out on them?

View Comment (1)

Keto says:

August 31, 2018 at 8:20 pm

Not at all my dear, they needed the compound and the guest quarters which you left for them. So I don’t see any reason why they should be bitter about your absence. Their insinuation alone about you not being happy your sister-in-law is getting married is enough reason to walk out on them. That’s how they behave as if they will tolerate same in their homes. If I were in your shoes I would have done same. Rubbish!