Dear MIMsters: How Do I Handle My Entitled Father On This Delicate Matter?
How do I handle my entitled father on this delicate matter?
I am the first child of my parents and I have a younger sister. My parents are separated but they were never married.
My father never sent me to school. I was 5 years old when I was taken to live with my paternal relatives with the promise that they will send me to school. But when I was supposed to write my SSCE, I was sent back to my parents. My mother, my late grandmother paid my WAEC fees.
Afterwards, my mum’s brother sent me to the university and he is also the one currently paying my sister’s fees in the higher institution.
Now that I am preparing to get married, my father is giving me tough times. He is demanding that my fiancé should pay for our official introduction. My fiance and I are from the same place, and it is not right to demand for money during introduction. My father said he has no money to entertain his guest so my fiancé must pay for the entertainment. The proper way of introduction in my place is the man will come with wine and a basket of nine different fruits.
My father never shouldered his responsibility as a parent to me, so I told him that I want a low key wedding. He said my mum shouldn’t attend my wedding because of their misunderstanding. My fiancé family is saying that they will not pay a dime for the introduction because it’s unheard of that a guest will have to pay to be hosted. I honestly don’t know what to do now.
My mother is of the opinion that I should not pay anything because my father just wants to extort from my fiancé. My father is not even carrying my mother’s family along. Honestly, I am just honoring my father and his family because of God, because if I look at what I went through in the past, I won’t even reckon with them.
How do I handle this?